How can I get a Jewish woman? I am lonely.

[cosmokramer]

I am very lonely you guys. I need a woman in my life. I cant figure out why there is a lack of Jewish women? Talking to one now, but she listens to rap and likes black culture. BTW, she is an Israeli. Nice woman, but she needs to cut that out. Right now I can only be friends with her. My point is I want to get married by 23. I want to start a family and become religious. What I really need is a sephardic women, but they are hard to come across. IDK, maybe I'm too picky. But after awhile I can take this anymore. I need to be married. AT least to me, I feel a piece of my soul is missing. And I want it back, I hope to get it back soon G-d willing.

[Ehud]

You don't want a woman who likes rap and black culture, Moshe. 

In my opinion, if you feel like a part of your soul is missing, you should deal with that before you get married.  Getting married won't fix all your internal problems.  When you get married, ideally you should be at peace with yourself.  How old are you right now?

[Joe Schmo]

I am very lonely you guys. I need a woman in my life. I cant figure out why there is a lack of Jewish women? Talking to one now, but she listens to rap and likes black culture. BTW, she is an Israeli. Nice woman, but she needs to cut that out. Right now I can only be friends with her. My point is I want to get married by 23. I want to start a family and become religious. What I really need is a sephardic women, but they are hard to come across. IDK, maybe I'm too picky. But after awhile I can take this anymore. I need to be married. AT least to me, I feel a piece of my soul is missing. And I want it back, I hope to get it back soon G-d willing.

Move to Israel.  There are many Jewish Women there.

[cosmokramer]

You don't want a woman who likes rap and black culture, Moshe. 

In my opinion, if you feel like a part of your soul is missing, you should deal with that before you get married.  Getting married won't fix all your internal problems.  When you get married, ideally you should be at peace with yourself.  How old are you right now?

Twenty, I am looking for the right woman though Ze'ev.

[cjd]

The only way to have a full soul is to get married because people are born with half a soul and their spouse completes them.

G-d forbid a person should get a divorce in most cases the woman leaves with everything including the half soul the person started off with

[jdl4ever]

Well, no rush to get married right away.  I think that if you are settled down, making money and are in your mid to late 20's, then the Jewish women will chase after you. 

[Ehud]

The only way to have a full soul is to get married because people are born with half a soul and their spouse completes them.

Yes I know that, but I have a feeling that what Moshe is talking about is a deeper psychological issue than just that.  I hope that he just means that he feels like his soul is missing in the sense that he wants a woman's soul to rejoin with his, rather than him just feeling generally empty and soulless inside, G-d forbid.   

[Daniel]

I think that the Jewish personals web sites are a great way to go. They've worked out better for me than trying to go out to find a nice Jewish girl. JDate is one of the biggest ones. You can choose the level of observance you'd like the girl to have on JDate. There's also Frumster which is geared more towards religious Jews. There is also Jpeoplemeet and a number of other Jewish personals web sites. I think it would be well worth it to give at least one of these a try. Good luck!

[Brennanfan]

Cosmo, I am almost 27 and still single. Insisting you get married by 23 is dangerous. I wanted to get married as soon as possible also, and look at me.

I have the exact same problem you do, albeit for different reasons. There aren't a lot of Kahanist Christian women out there who never smoke or drink and want to adopt and only adopt.

Hang in there, bro. I feel your pain completely.

Chaimfan

[newman]

Buy a Mercedes.

[The Shadow]

I am very lonely you guys. I need a woman in my life. I cant figure out why there is a lack of Jewish women? Talking to one now, but she listens to rap and likes black culture. BTW, she is an Israeli. Nice woman, but she needs to cut that out. Right now I can only be friends with her. My point is I want to get married by 23. I want to start a family and become religious. What I really need is a sephardic women, but they are hard to come across. IDK, maybe I'm too picky. But after awhile I can take this anymore. I need to be married. AT least to me, I feel a piece of my soul is missing. And I want it back, I hope to get it back soon G-d willing.

Cosmo, you seem like a really nice guy.  I know its hard. I used to get hung up on girls all the time when I was younger.  I still get hung up from time to time.  But Your time will come.   You must concenrate on bettering yourself.

I was lost too.  I eventually concentrated on myself, and through a college education, and years of grad school,  now I'm in a good position.  Trust me. keep bettering yourself through education and eventually a girl will cross your  path.    A girl will not complete you.  They will only take from you.   Take control of your life!  Trust me, I know how you feel!  I'm 38 and I've been there before!

[jdl4ever]

Buy a Mercedes.

Or buy her Chinese food.   

[Ehud]

Buy a Mercedes.

I don't think he wants to get a self-hating Jewess magnet.     Imagine the type of women who are attracted by that, YUCK!

[Mishmaat]

Wow, you're ambitious. I'm 23 and I don't believe I'm ready for marriage. Far from it. Moshe, I wish you all the best.

[Mishmaat]

The Infidel you bring up a good point. I can't think of any women in their early twenties who are married minded. I'm sure they're out there, but they're most definitely a rarity.

[newman]

The Infidel you bring up a good point. I can't think of any women in their early twenties who are married minded. I'm sure they're out there, but they're most definitely a rarity.

In the mainstream community, marriage before ones late 20s or early 30s is seen as foolish, unwise and a mistake. The divorce rate is still much higher today than two generations ago when not being married by 25 was seen as abnormal so they can't be right.

[Dr. Dan]

listen, it will come at the right time...dont' push it..just do your thing...it will come on its own volition.


btw,i'm on the same boat as you...except i'm not 23 anymore.

[Yisrael]

There are many singles events here in NYC. It might pay to come here to find your wife.

[newman]

Seriously Cosmo,

Israel is the best bet. Wall to wall gorgeous Jewesses with realistic expectations.

Trying to find a religious Jewess is the USA is not easy. Trying to find any woman (Jewish or otherwise) who isn't holding out for a guy on six figures with a Mercedes is hard, too.

Make Aliyah while your still young. At 20 you'll adjust relatively easily and have plenty of time to find a young bride. Wait longer and before you know it you'll be 28, 30.............and it'll be harder.

[mord]

I think you will have to move to another city perhaps

[cjd]

At the age of twenty you have plenty of time to find the right girl. Don't rush nothing worse than making a bad decision with something like this. If I remember correctly you said you were moving to Israel in a short while. If that is the case you should possibly wait until you get there before you start to seriously look. Above all don't put pressure on yourself about this it will cloud your judgement and  cause you to overlook things that you might otherwise not.

[Lubab]

I am very lonely you guys. I need a woman in my life. I cant figure out why there is a lack of Jewish women? Talking to one now, but she listens to rap and likes black culture. BTW, she is an Israeli. Nice woman, but she needs to cut that out. Right now I can only be friends with her. My point is I want to get married by 23. I want to start a family and become religious. What I really need is a sephardic women, but they are hard to come across. IDK, maybe I'm too picky. But after awhile I can take this anymore. I need to be married. AT least to me, I feel a piece of my soul is missing. And I want it back, I hope to get it back soon G-d willing.

If you want to be religious when you are married I would recommend starting now. Girls will want to marry the man you are, not the man you're going to be.

This you keep you on a good path until you find your wife and being part of the Orthodox community will give you lots of new connections to women who also want a Torah home like you do .

Much success!

[Kiwi]

Girls will want to marry the man you are, not the man you're going to be.

Exactly, very true 

[Sarah]

In the mean time, be very social so you don't get lonely.

[Sarah]

I am very lonely you guys. I need a woman in my life. I cant figure out why there is a lack of Jewish women? Talking to one now, but she listens to rap and likes black culture. BTW, she is an Israeli. Nice woman, but she needs to cut that out. Right now I can only be friends with her. My point is I want to get married by 23. I want to start a family and become religious. What I really need is a sephardic women, but they are hard to come across. IDK, maybe I'm too picky. But after awhile I can take this anymore. I need to be married. AT least to me, I feel a piece of my soul is missing. And I want it back, I hope to get it back soon G-d willing.

If you want to be religious when you are married I would recommend starting now. Girls will want to marry the man you are, not the man you're going to be.

This you keep you on a good path until you find your wife and being part of the Orthodox community will give you lots of new connections to women who also want a Torah home like you do .

Much success!

I also will be religious when I get married. Being married puts you in a religious framework. A religious wife brings the husband back to Judaism. And she enables him to keep Shabbat by preparing food on Friday Afternoon for Shabbat when he wouldn't be able to do so on his own.

This is all part of women civilizing men. Women are more spiritual than men and are the soulmate of their husband. When they get married, the man connects with the spiritual half of him that he didn't have before. Getting married and having relations with one's wife actually is a way of getting closer to G-d. It is also a mitzvah to have relations with one's wife. Getting married is returning to the other half of your soul and returning to G-d. That is why we fast on our wedding day. It is a personal Yom Kippur and we then break the fast when we are alone with our spouse for the first time [In the yichud (union) room.]. The bride and groom are very holy on their wedding day and people can ask them to pray for them. They are King and Queen.

That is really wonderful.

Though how about the idea of living every day as if it is your last? Anybody can die before they get married, before becoming fully religious since they've left it to what they expected to be as the future. Is this bad?

But Yacov since women can exersise free will they cannot be perfect.
In Judaism are there beliefs in Angels?