General Category > General Discussion
Cohabiting.
Din Rodef:
--- Quote from: sat_chit_anand on April 04, 2007, 02:48:55 AM ---Change the laws and tax systems so that it is more in support of young couples who wish to marry, stay together and have children, if you must.
--- End quote ---
This is a good point too
In America, one of the reasons driving cohabitation is actually economic.
But that brings in a whole 'nother set of issues.
dawntreader:
I've got to weigh in and say I agree with Sat_chit_Anand on this issue.
I don't think co-habiting is worse than homosexuality at all. While I believe that marriage is better, there has always been the argument of..."What constitutes a marriage?"
If there were no Rabbi, no Priest, Priestess, Justice of the Peace, Magistrate....whatever...to marry you...and you lived in the sticks or whatever...or if you were marooned on an island with just the person you love...would G-d see fit to condemn you because you decided to agree with one another that you are married?
What about Adam and Eve? Who married them? Was it G-d? Or did G-d just give Eve to Adam and say, "Here ya go Adam! Here's a woman I made especially for you!"
Nope. Can't agree that cohabiting is worse than homosexuality.
Also...what about polygamy? Wouldn't you say that being married to more than one woman is better than homosexuality? It's probably better than "Shacking up" as well. There are tons of Biblical references to godly men who had more than one wife. King David did for sure.
If countries have laws allowing homosexuality, shouldn't other forms of "co-habiting" or "Marriage" also be allowed? (Ones that are not necessarily perverse?)
Some say that this would help prevent "serial monogamy." Marry, divorce, marry someone new, divorce, marry again.
Fruit of thy loins:
Wow. If gentiles are to be condemned for cohabitation then not many gentiles are going to be in the World to Come. I'd say 95% of people under 30 today have cohabited at some point. It is self-defeating to hold gentiles up to high standards of sexual morality anyway. :)
Lisa:
I am totally against cohabiting. It's just a way for a man to have the milk for free without buying the entire cow. And the women ultimately end up suffering for it. After all, why would a man go through the trouble of making a commitment before G-d and all his family when he already has many of the same benefits of marriage already?
And it's true that women contribute to this problem by agreeing to move in with their boyfriends. I've heard stories about men and women living together for years, where the man never even wanted to marry the woman. She was just nice to "have around."
I used to know a girl who was rather promiscous. On the singles weekend where I met her, she found a guy she liked and put out for him right there and then. And EVERY weekend after that, for the next two years, she would trek over to Delaware from Westchester just to sleep with the guy. Needless to say the guy STILL did not propose to her after all that time. I encourage her to find someone else. And do you know what the first guy finally said to her??? He said "But I wasn't sure I even liked you that much."
In other words, he liked her enough to have sex with her every weekend for two years, but not to marry her.
Then I've heard stories about men and women living together for years, when all of the sudded the man meets someone else through work or a vacation and marries her right away.
So to answer Chaimfan's question, I think, as a straight woman that cohabiting is much much worse. The reason is because the choices that some women make affect the options available to other women. Cohabiting is an example. In other words, it becomes much harder for old fashioned, modest, women who want to wait until marriage to be intimate, when men can easily get the sex and companionship without having to marry.
Din Rodef:
Lisa is absolutely correct...from a woman's perspective...
....if the majority of women are sluts then how does a nice girl compete? When men are expecting sex and cohabitation without marriage, then how does a nice girl demand commitment when there are many other girls that don't make such demands.
For nice girls....it's a "no win" situation. The entire culture has collapsed.
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