FTF, you are not weak, you are honest. The vids are not too be taken lightly. They are graphic and they will change you in a way I can not explain. They will make you livid, angry and sick to the extent of being physically sick. They will though show you , what these demons believe in. For a lack of better terms, it will be like eating from the tree of knowledge. You will have it, but for the rest of your life, you won't forget it.
And you will take the memories of watching the vids too your grave.