Fruit: "... I could never get a blonde attractive German woman to want me..."
SURE YOU CAN, FRUIT!
Take up a really cool sport; say for example, GOLF@
Change your name to something "jungle-like"....something like "TIGER", or "PANTHER"
Then rub Stein's Theatrical Grease Paint #25 all over exposed skin areas, and go push your way into exclusive All-White Country Clubs.
Make sure a sickly white boy carries your golf clubs for you.
Every time you pass some buxom Swedish babe or Princess Diana type on the green, smile at her the way a crocodile smiles when natives fall off of the canoe, and jabber some mumbo-jumbo at her, something like...
Yeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!...Me go pee goe uh huh, ssssssaaaallrite deh' yobbyobbidyobbidy...yeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaah babeee now!
Before you hit the 9th hole, your golfing jacket pocket will be stuffed with torn matchbook covers with telephone numbers hurriedly written on them underneath names like Flikke, Hedde, Marga, Ilse, Annika, ....
You'll see!