Author Topic: Six Steps to Success for Democrats in 2010  (Read 1021 times)

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Offline Confederate Kahanist

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Six Steps to Success for Democrats in 2010
« on: August 14, 2010, 08:26:13 PM »
http://action.afa.net/Blogs/BlogPost.aspx?id=2147497421

Elijah Friedeman, the Millennial Perspective

The mid-terms are approaching, the party in power is burdened with an unpopular president, candidates are distancing themselves from the party, and to add to their problems the party is plagued by ethics problems. Voters are ready for a change, tired of the current state of affairs in the nation.

What year is it? Well, take your pick. The same thing that happened to the GOP in 2006 is happening to the Democrats right now. And, it looks like the results of the mid-terms will be similar. Republicans lost big in 2006 when the political climate was colored blue. But right now, if you're a Republican strategist, the prospects couldn't look cheerier. The Democrats are burdened with the same problems the Republicans had in 2006, except with one important difference. In 2006, the Republicans weren't facing backlash from extremely unpopular spending bills and healthcare legislation.

Four years ago this didn't seem possible, but it actually happened. Democrats have become the new Republicans. No, I'm not talking in terms of policy. I'm talking about the total collapse on the part of the Democrats. A defeat snatched from the jaws of victory that even Republicans couldn't have pulled off. Democrats have been reduced to mere shells of their proud, enthusiastic 2008-selves. Once the savior, Obama is now like a millstone around the Democrats' neck, a situation that hardly seemed possible right after 2008's Hope and Change revolution.

Things look bleak for Democratic candidates this election cycle. Since I'm a nice guy, and since I think competition keeps everyone who's involved in the political process more honest, I'm going to do something that I've never done before. Listen up, Democrats, I'm offering you some free advice here on how to get elected. Get your pencils and notepads ready.

Step 1. Lose that Obama guy. Do whatever you can to distance yourself from him. You don't know him, never did.

Step 2. Find some way to wash your hands of the healthcare bill. It doesn't matter whether you burn the law in effigy or just repeatedly denounce it in new and exciting ways. If possible, combine this with step 1 to completely cut all ties between you and the most unpopular president since George Bush.

Step 3. Help can Charles Rangel and Maxine waters. Sure, they've been around for awhile, but you need to go after them anyway. Show voters that your talk of an ethical congress is more than just hot air.

Step 4. Realize the wonderful fact that you're really against massive, debt-load-increasing legislation. Sure, you may have voted for it, but don't let that stop you. Distance yourself from pretty much all the legislation passed in the last eighteen months. Trust me, if you can convince the voters that from now on you will be a responsible, deficit-hating representative or senator, your road to victory will be significantly easier.

Step 5. Since we're on the topic of victory, I've got a question: you do want to win, don't you? Sure you do. So go ahead and switch parties if possible. Or at least become an independent. The "D" after your name just isn't helping the cause of victory.

Step 6. Choose an issue typically championed by conservatives - border control, for example - and make it your own. Out-conservative your opponent. Of course, you'll have to betray your liberal agenda, but it's in the name of victory, so you can rest assured that Pelosi and Co. will forgive you if you win.

Once you've cut all your connections to Obama and Obamacare, kicked all the ethics violators out of congress, become more conservative, and switched parties, you'll do better in the mid-terms. Sure, you still might lose. But until you accomplish these steps, well, you're headed for an almost certain defeat in November. So do yourself a favor, and follow these six easy steps to political success. And look on the bright side, I'm not even charging you for this.
Chad M ~ Your rebel against white guilt