Kahanist Singles > Jewish Singles
Is it a good idea to have sex ed?
Kiwi:
--- Quote from: MassuhDGoodName on January 02, 2008, 11:56:47 PM ---skippy: "...tenth year pfft wished that you married the TV in some cases..."
Skippy,
I have this theory that the happiest marriages would be those in which the husband and wife occupy separate bedrooms, and not be around each other constantly.
It seems to me that some of the happiest housewives I have known were those whose husbands were always away from home on business trips.
In your opinion, do you think this kind of arrangement might help keep the fires of passion burning and prevent marital "burnout"?
--- End quote ---
Oh yes, some of my happest moments was when I was deployed or my husband was. Thats how we lasted 10 years.
Marriage, now the younger you are the more naive and tolerant of your partner. And sex if high on the agenda.
Age plays a very important role in relationships.
When you are older you see things very different.
Sharing the bed. Yes its nice the comfort and closeness that it provides, but what about the breathing in ones face or *shudder* breathing down your neck. Cute for a while then ...........no.
Or its a heat wave and you are sweating melting into a pile of whatever and you have another heated body sweating all over you too. Sexy I think not.
Or when Its womens time, you don't want to be near people, you are unclean, not a time for closeness.
Or work shift you don't want to be in a room with people you need rest and quiet.
Or if you have a cold or they have, dribbling coughing, snorting over you, yes very romantic NOT!
Or what about the farting, stretching and snoring, being a blanket hog, coming over yourside of the bed.
Personal space!!!!!
Foreign concept to some people.
Separate beds yes at times or big huge king size bed.
Not being connected to each others hip 24 hours a day is a good thing.
Theres a saying "how can I miss you if you don't go away".
Time apart does allow a more passionate reunion, but not to long of a break tho.
Business is fine, but they go on trips just to get away, not fine.
To be away from your spouse you need complete trust, and couples that can't ever do this I wonder why? maybe no trust is there. ;)
When you are an adult you don't require 24 hour attention.
Zvulun Ben Moshe:
--- Quote from: Dr. Dan on December 31, 2007, 01:34:14 PM ---
--- Quote from: There Are No 'Israeli' Arabs on December 31, 2007, 01:30:27 PM ---
--- Quote from: Dr. Dan on December 31, 2007, 08:05:58 AM ---
--- Quote from: There Are No 'Israeli' Arabs on December 30, 2007, 11:11:56 PM ---
--- Quote from: Dr. Dan on December 30, 2007, 08:04:33 PM ---
--- Quote from: Skippy on December 30, 2007, 07:06:29 PM ---Whoa hold up this is not what that was about. :-\
Its is about the Jewish marriage laws.
And how to remain with in the laws when married.
Not about single people and sex and porno's.
This is about preparing people for that part of their married lives.
Geezzz. ::)
--- End quote ---
Well it's good to follow the halakha when one is married..however, what the husband and wife do in the privacy of their home is not even Gd's business.
--- End quote ---
Resisting the temptation to grill you over what you just said, I have another question for the Love Doctor:
How much does it mean for you to keep the Nidda laws? Would you not mind ignoring this IMPORTANT practice in your own marraige?
--- End quote ---
It is the most important thing!!!!! The Nidda law will be one of those things that will allow for a successful marriage!
Actually the truth is, besides nidda, i don't know what is allowed or not allowed...I dont' want to get explicit on this forum, but it is a relgious question and it is about sex but not necessarily actual intercourse..so i'm being very oblique right now...are there other sexual acts between a consenting husband and wife which are not allowed and those which are permitted?
--- End quote ---
It is also more important because you will go into spiritual excommunication for not keeping the Nidda laws. But yes, G-d's rules do add to a successful marriage.
As for your question on what can and cannot be done between a man and a women, first of all, yes, according to the ruling in the Shulhan Aruch, there are a few limitations, mostly having to do with foreplay (it is still practically mandatory for a man to engage in it with his wife). The minority opinion of the Rambam (in this particular matter) is a lot more lenient with what is permitted (and there are still some limitations that ALL agree on). Nevertheless, he stresses that a couple must conduct themselves with holiness and purity, and not engage in acts that will trivialize or frivol the important and extremely holy act of sex between a husband and wife.
--- End quote ---
I agree with this 100%!!
now when i refer to the privacy of one's home...while it is important to keep the marraige holy and sex etc, still yet, whatever kinkiness, so to speak, that a husband and wife agree on, is between themselves only...
--- End quote ---
Dear Doctor, I think you simply don't know what your are talking about. With all due respect, if you read the laws, you will understand that it is not the "next level" that you can forego, but a bare minimum for a strong and pure relationship.
Dr. Dan:
--- Quote from: Zvulun ben Moshe on January 20, 2008, 08:05:21 PM ---
--- Quote from: Dr. Dan on December 31, 2007, 01:34:14 PM ---
--- Quote from: There Are No 'Israeli' Arabs on December 31, 2007, 01:30:27 PM ---
--- Quote from: Dr. Dan on December 31, 2007, 08:05:58 AM ---
--- Quote from: There Are No 'Israeli' Arabs on December 30, 2007, 11:11:56 PM ---
--- Quote from: Dr. Dan on December 30, 2007, 08:04:33 PM ---
--- Quote from: Skippy on December 30, 2007, 07:06:29 PM ---Whoa hold up this is not what that was about. :-\
Its is about the Jewish marriage laws.
And how to remain with in the laws when married.
Not about single people and sex and porno's.
This is about preparing people for that part of their married lives.
Geezzz. ::)
--- End quote ---
Well it's good to follow the halakha when one is married..however, what the husband and wife do in the privacy of their home is not even Gd's business.
--- End quote ---
Resisting the temptation to grill you over what you just said, I have another question for the Love Doctor:
How much does it mean for you to keep the Nidda laws? Would you not mind ignoring this IMPORTANT practice in your own marraige?
--- End quote ---
It is the most important thing!!!!! The Nidda law will be one of those things that will allow for a successful marriage!
Actually the truth is, besides nidda, i don't know what is allowed or not allowed...I dont' want to get explicit on this forum, but it is a relgious question and it is about sex but not necessarily actual intercourse..so i'm being very oblique right now...are there other sexual acts between a consenting husband and wife which are not allowed and those which are permitted?
--- End quote ---
It is also more important because you will go into spiritual excommunication for not keeping the Nidda laws. But yes, G-d's rules do add to a successful marriage.
As for your question on what can and cannot be done between a man and a women, first of all, yes, according to the ruling in the Shulhan Aruch, there are a few limitations, mostly having to do with foreplay (it is still practically mandatory for a man to engage in it with his wife). The minority opinion of the Rambam (in this particular matter) is a lot more lenient with what is permitted (and there are still some limitations that ALL agree on). Nevertheless, he stresses that a couple must conduct themselves with holiness and purity, and not engage in acts that will trivialize or frivol the important and extremely holy act of sex between a husband and wife.
--- End quote ---
I agree with this 100%!!
now when i refer to the privacy of one's home...while it is important to keep the marraige holy and sex etc, still yet, whatever kinkiness, so to speak, that a husband and wife agree on, is between themselves only...
--- End quote ---
Dear Doctor, I think you simply don't what your are talking about. With all due respect, if you read the laws, you will understand that it is not the "next level" that you can forego, but a bare minimum for a strong and pure relationship.
--- End quote ---
Well to each their own..I don't want another person telling me what me and wife are allowed to do in the privacy of our home.
RationalThought110:
--- Quote from: Skippy on January 01, 2008, 11:35:40 PM ---
Trust me I did when I was married, I get bored after the first 5 minutes.
--- End quote ---
You're divorced? How long were you married for? Aren't you currently engaged or married?
Kiwi:
--- Quote from: RationalThought110 on January 21, 2008, 05:25:06 AM ---
--- Quote from: Skippy on January 01, 2008, 11:35:40 PM ---
Trust me I did when I was married, I get bored after the first 5 minutes.
--- End quote ---
You're divorced? How long were you married for? Aren't you currently engaged or married?
--- End quote ---
yes, 10 years and 3 years, and yes engaged at this point.
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