Ha Ha HA !! More Islamic comedy!! It has been stated here by someone in a very amusing post that Muhammad was the original stand up comedian. Or should I say is, because I am sure he is in hell doing his thing as we speak.
That was me.
I'm glad you liked it.
Yes, I did like it. It was very original and ingenious.... and FUNNY of course. Did you put a lot of research into that or did you pretty much know what and where to find those insane "scriptures". Or can one simply open the Quran to virtually any page and find nonsense?
Actually, when you open the Quran to virtually any page and you will find incoherence, repitition, hate and evil.
The Hadith is coherent but usually hilariously stupid.
I didn't do much research on my own. I took the quotes from
http://prophetofdoom.net/Islamic_Quotes_Stupidity.IslamI hand-picked the stupidest quotes and gave my little commentary on it.
I could also do another version of other quotes but they would be sad and depressing and not all that funny.
Although all of the quotes in which demons speak about how wonderful the Quran is, are somewhat funny.
Qur'an 46:30 "We [Jinns/Demons] have heard a Book revealed after Moses, confirming what came before it: it guides to the Truth and to a Straight Path.' 'O our people, hearken to the one who invites (you) to Allah, and believe in him. He will forgive you your sins, and deliver you from a Penalty Grievous.'"
Demons beleive in the Quran and beleive that it leads you to the Truth and a Straight Path. Very interesting.Qur'an 72:1 "Say (Muhammad): 'It has been revealed to me that a group of (three to ten) Jinn [demons or devils] listened (to the Qur'an). They said, "We have heard a really wonderful recital (of this Qur'an)! It guides to the Right Path. We have come to believe it. We shall not associate anything with our Lord."
Demons think the Quran is wonderful. Do you?Bukhari:V5B58N199 "'Who informed you Prophet about the Jinn [Demons] when they heard the Qur'an?' He said, 'A tree informed me about them.'"
A tree speaks to muhammad to let him know demons listen to his Quran. Okey Dokey.Ishaq:510 "When the Apostle looked down on Khaybar he told his Companions, 'O Allah, Lord of the heavens and what they overshadow, and Lord of the Devils and what into error they throw, and Lord of the winds and what they winnow, we ask Thee for the booty of this town and its people. Forward in the name of Allah.'"
Muhammad just claimed that Allah is the Lord of the Devils. Wow!!!!Qur'an 72:13 "So, since we [Jinn/Devils] have listened to the guidance (of the Qur'an), we have accepted (Islam): and any who believes in his Lord has no fear of loss, force, or oppression."
Demon accepted Islam and listen to the guidance of the Quran. Demons are Muslims and Muslims are Demons.Qur'an 79:1 "I swear by those who violently tear out (the souls), and drag them to destruction."
Isn't Muhammad a sweetheart?Qur'an 81:24 "Neither is he a concealer, withholding knowledge of the unseen. Nor is it (the Qur'an) the Word of an evil spirit accursed, the utterance of a devil, the curses of Satan."
Why do you have to keep claiming the Quran is not Demonic, though?
Guilty Conscience?Ishaq:580 "Our strong warriors obey his orders to the letter. By us Allah's religion is undeniably strong. You would think when our horses gallop with bits in their mouths that the sounds of demons are among them."
You would think that vicious murderers going out to murder Non-Muslims, steal the property, rape their wives and sell their children into slavery had the sounds of demons among them.
True.Bukhari:V7B71N660 "Magic was worked on Allah's Apostle so that he used to think that he had sexual relations with his wives while he actually had not. That is the hardest kind of magic as it has such an effect. One day he said, 'O Aisha, do you know that Allah has instructed me concerning the matter I asked Him about? Two men came to me and one of them sat near my head and the other near my feet. The one asked, "What is wrong with this man?" "He is under the effect of magic." "Who cast the magic spell on him?" "Labid, an Arab ally of the Jews and a hypocrite." "What material did he use to cast the spell?" "A comb with hair stuck to it." "Where is that comb and hair?" "In a skin of pollen of a male palm tree kept under a stone in the well of Dharwan."' So the Prophet went to that well and took out those things, saying, 'That was the well shown to me in the dream. Its water looked red and its palms looked like the heads of devils. My companions removed those things.' I said, 'Why didn't you just treat yourself?' He said, 'Allah has cured me, and I don't want to spread evil among my people.'"
I don't need to comment on this one. Just read every word.Bukhari:V5B58N200 "I carried a water pot for the Prophet's ablution and for cleaning his private parts. While following him with the pot, the Prophet turned and said, 'Who are you?' 'I am Abu.' The Prophet said, 'Bring me stones in order to clean my private parts, but do not bring any bones or animal dung.' So I brought some stones, carrying them in the corner of my robe till I put them by his side. When he finished, I walked with him and asked, 'What can you tell me about the bones and the animal dung?' He said, 'They are of the food of Jinns [Devils]. A delegate of Jinns of the city of Nasibin came to me - and how nice those Jinns were - and asked me for the remains of human food. I invoked Allah for them that they would never pass by a bone or animal dung but find food on them.'"
Just listen to muhammad say "how nice those Jinns were."
Muhammad thinks demons are nice.Bukhari:V1B11N582 "Allah's Apostle said, 'When the Adhan [the call to prayer] is announced, Satan takes to his heels and passes wind with noise during his flight in order not to hear the Adhan.'"
Satan farts in order not to hear the Muslim call to prayer. No comment neccesary.Tabari VI:107 "Satan Cast a False Qur'an Revelation on the Messenger of Allah's Tongue."
Hmmm, so Muhammad cannot distiguish between a True Quran Revelation and a False one. He cannot distinguish between Allah speaking to him and Satan speaking to him.
Devastating.Qur'an 113:1 "Say: I seek refuge with the Lord of the Dawn from the mischief of the evil He created."
Qur'an 113:3 "From the mischievous evil of Darkness as it becomes intensely dark, and from the mischief of those who practice the evil of malignant witchcraft and blowing on knots, and from the mischievous evil of the envier when he covets."
Qur'an 114:1 "Say: I seek refuge in the Lord of men and jinn [demons], the King of men and jinn, the Ilah (God) of men and jinn."
Qur'an 114:4 "From the evil of the sneaking Devil who Whispers Evil and withdraws after his whisper, the slinking Satan, the same who whispers into the hearts of mankind from among the jinn and men."
This is so Satanic. I don't understand how anyone beleives in this Demonic religion. 
Topic: General Commander of Iranian Army: "I do not think we will need more than 11 day (Read 1215 times)