Author Topic: Marriage - not for all?  (Read 5036 times)

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Offline Nonny

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Marriage - not for all?
« on: April 09, 2007, 08:45:54 PM »
An interesting article on the burgeoning number of unmarried over-30 Haredi "FFB" ("Frum From Birth") women http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/846376.html

If Hashem doesn't send the right partner, or the cheishek doesn't rise to the requisite level, why force the issue (no pun intended). Life's too short to be miserable!

Look at our Chayim ben Pesach: he's 50, unmarried and loving it!

Some men and women have functions on Earth more important than even the mitzva of "pru u'revu", and for whom marriage would be an intolerable distraction to their ordained tafkid.

The divorce rate in the secular world is 60% and even amongst religious is said to be 10% There is a prediction that before Moshiach, everything in nature will cease to reproduce, including humans!
« Last Edit: April 09, 2007, 09:30:26 PM by Nonny »

Offline RationalThought110

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2007, 08:50:13 PM »
Explain the term 'cheishek'.   Explain the prediction.

Offline Trumpeldor

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2007, 09:02:27 PM »
An interesting article on the burgeoning number of unmarried over-30 Haredi "FFB" ("Frum From Birth") women http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/846376.html



Look at our Chayim ben Pesach: he's 50, unmarried and loving it!



You couldn't be more wrong. Chaim bemoans this fact everyday.

G-d commands us to get married and have children.

Offline Nonny

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2007, 09:16:32 PM »
Quote from: Trumpeldor
G-d commands us to get married and have children.

In normal times, you'd be right.

But if we're really in the Ikvosa d'Meshicha, when women will take on men's roles - נקבה תסובב גבר - "A woman will pursue a man" (Yirmiya 31), and where "Before Ben David...a man's worst enemies will be his in-laws and members of his own household" (Sota 49), some neshomos would not be able to withstand the stresses of marriage and child rearing (ie divorce, heart attack, family violence or jail ch"v).

So Hashem sends them no mate, out of Mercy!
« Last Edit: April 09, 2007, 09:24:51 PM by Nonny »

Offline Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2007, 09:47:57 PM »
I agree that marriage is not for all--nor is having children. I believe G-d's plans for each of us are far more precise and custom-tailored than one societal mold.

That said, "alternative lifestyles" do not count in the above...  >:(

Offline Sarah

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2007, 10:41:44 PM »
When a person strays from the concept of marriage and trys to indulge in various other doings or life styles, it will more the certainly lead to the reaping of sins.
They seemingly think they are free and have no limits.
Chaim ben pesach WANTS to get married and does not stray from the benefits he forsees in doing so.

The divorce rate has gone up, why exactly...probably due to other factors affecting it that also have increased e.g. Adultery...these things are becoming unpunished for and so rise.

 

Offline Fruit of thy loins

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #6 on: April 10, 2007, 12:09:36 PM »
There is a prediction that before Moshiach, everything in nature will cease to reproduce, including humans!


Black Africans and Arabs are breeding like there's no tomorrow.  And surprisingly they used to be a minority of the world's population even compared to Europeans and Americans.

What is required to 'get Europe breeding again' is large-scale movements of people, including sending native Europeans to other countries and bringing other groups of people to Europe.  THe Americans already know that and that's why 20% of Mexico lives in the USA. 

Something about establishing oneself in a foreign land causes one to be more likely to have babies (often with the local women if possible).

Nietzsche argued in 1882 that Europe should divest 20% of its population and replace them with Orientals.  Fast forward over a hundred years and we find many European countries with combined Muslim/ethnic populations of close to 20% ....
Every white woman deserves the black man of her dreams.  But what does every white man deserve?

Offline MassuhDGoodName

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #7 on: April 10, 2007, 04:12:35 PM »
Re:  "...Black Africans and Arabs are breeding like there's no tomorrow..."

Very interesting...

What type is produced by such unions...

Extreme violence & criminal behavior in the negro?...

Or...Darker Arabs with an IQ so low as to be virtually unmeasurable?

Offline Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #8 on: April 10, 2007, 07:25:34 PM »
There's no such thing as an Arab without a low IQ as it is.  :P

Offline Until Shiloh Comes

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #9 on: April 10, 2007, 10:16:56 PM »
Look at our Chayim ben Pesach: he's 50, unmarried and loving it!

Hello Nonny, and good day.

I must confess that I question your sincerity here when you make statements like these.   
Psalm 53:2 "The fool hath said in his heart, 'There is no G-D.'"

Offline Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #10 on: April 10, 2007, 11:00:19 PM »
I second Shiloh. That was a really inane and outright false thing to say.

Offline Tzvi Ben Roshel1

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #11 on: April 11, 2007, 02:21:02 AM »
Quote from: Trumpeldor
G-d commands us to get married and have children.

In normal times, you'd be right.

But if we're really in the Ikvosa d'Meshicha, when women will take on men's roles - נקבה תסובב גבר - "A woman will pursue a man" (Yirmiya 31), and where "Before Ben David...a man's worst enemies will be his in-laws and members of his own household" (Sota 49), some neshomos would not be able to withstand the stresses of marriage and child rearing (ie divorce, heart attack, family violence or jail ch"v).

So Hashem sends them no mate, out of Mercy!

its not for us to look into the future and deal with G-ds calculations. The Torah commanded us to get married and be fruitful and multiply and its its only in g-ds hands what happens next (and actually even before), what every1 should do is first look for their partner, get married and work it out, never loose hope, and most of all pray everyday that everything goes good, for your marriage, business, friendships, and everything else.
The Academy of Elijah taught, whoever studies the laws (of the Torah) every day, (he) is guaranteed to have a share in the World to Come.

‏119:139 צִמְּתַתְנִי קִנְאָתִי כִּישָׁכְחוּ דְבָרֶיךָ צָרָי
My zeal incenses me, for my adversaries have forgotten Your words.
‏119:141 צָעִיר אָנֹכִי וְנִבְזֶה פִּקֻּדֶיךָ, לֹא שָׁכָחְתִּי.
 I am young and despised; I have not forgotten Your precepts.

" A fool does not realize, and an unwise person does not understand this (i.e. the following:) When the wicked bloom like grass, and the evildoers blossom (i.e. when they seem extremly successful), it is to destroy them forever (i.e. they are rewarded for their few good deeds in this World, and they will have no portion in the World to Come!)

Please visit: (The Greatest lectures on Earth).
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http://www.torahanytime.com/Rabbi/Yossi_Mizrachi/
http://www.torahanytime.com/Rabbi/Zecharia_Wallerstein/

Offline Nonny

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #12 on: April 11, 2007, 06:11:24 AM »
As R.Kahane wrote: "the only mitzva that is inherently dangerous is that of "Milchemet Mitzvah" ie there is a chance of dying/being injured whilst performing this mitzvah.

Otherwise, you are not allowed to put yourself in physical danger - sakanos nefoshos.

Divorce results in loss of reputation, mental health, physical health, acrimony, lawyers, law courts, physical fights, property fights, financial health and even emunah.

It is a mitzvah to marry.

(It is also a mitzvah to give a get when required)!

In the past, the chance of divorce was remote.

But in this (according to all opinions, pre-Messianic) generation, the chance has rise to 60% for secular and even 10% for frum (the Feminist Movement has a lot to blame for this - women have risen out of their place - they are meant to be second mates - ezer k'negdo - not equal joint-captains!).

If you were told that there's a 1 in 10 chance of bad things happening to you if you put on Tefillin, would you do it?!

 ie could an actual Halachic case be made that because the chance of damage as a result of marriage is so high (witness the British Chief Rabbi's "Pre-Nuptial Agreement" now made on Jewish weddings in the UK), that one is exempt on grounds of sakanos nefoshos?!
« Last Edit: April 11, 2007, 06:16:55 AM by Nonny »

Offline RationalThought110

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #13 on: April 11, 2007, 09:55:19 PM »
When a person strays from the concept of marriage and trys to indulge in various other doings or life styles, it will more the certainly lead to the reaping of sins.
They seemingly think they are free and have no limits.
Chaim ben pesach WANTS to get married and does not stray from the benefits he forsees in doing so.

The divorce rate has gone up, why exactly...probably due to other factors affecting it that also have increased e.g. Adultery...these things are becoming unpunished for and so rise.

 


Are Orthodox Jewish women scared of Chaim because he was forced to spend time in jail? 

Why haven't any of them wanted to marry him?

Offline Tzvi Ben Roshel1

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Re: Marriage - not for all?
« Reply #14 on: April 11, 2007, 10:49:51 PM »

 ie could an actual Halachic case be made that because the chance of damage as a result of marriage is so high (witness the British Chief Rabbi's "Pre-Nuptial Agreement" now made on Jewish weddings in the UK), that one is exempt on grounds of sakanos nefoshos?!

 ??? , I dont have much time, but an example against what your saying is the case with King Hezkiyahu who saw with Ruah Hakodesh that he would have a bad son, so he didnt want to get married, becuase of this a prophet of Israel ( I think Isaia) told King Hezkihau that he would "die and not live". meaning die in this world and not live in the world to come if he doesnt correct this. ( but he then repented and took the prophets daughter). the point- stop being soo depressed and worried of about what will happen, do what you have to and pray to G-d that it will turn out well.

  anyway of people would listin to you then where will the children come? and anyway many people are married and are happy, its the people who are selfish and self-centered who have the most problems in marriage and in life in general.
The Academy of Elijah taught, whoever studies the laws (of the Torah) every day, (he) is guaranteed to have a share in the World to Come.

‏119:139 צִמְּתַתְנִי קִנְאָתִי כִּישָׁכְחוּ דְבָרֶיךָ צָרָי
My zeal incenses me, for my adversaries have forgotten Your words.
‏119:141 צָעִיר אָנֹכִי וְנִבְזֶה פִּקֻּדֶיךָ, לֹא שָׁכָחְתִּי.
 I am young and despised; I have not forgotten Your precepts.

" A fool does not realize, and an unwise person does not understand this (i.e. the following:) When the wicked bloom like grass, and the evildoers blossom (i.e. when they seem extremly successful), it is to destroy them forever (i.e. they are rewarded for their few good deeds in this World, and they will have no portion in the World to Come!)

Please visit: (The Greatest lectures on Earth).
http://torahanytime.com/
http://www.torahanytime.com/Rabbi/Yossi_Mizrachi/
http://www.torahanytime.com/Rabbi/Zecharia_Wallerstein/