I wish that I will die today

[Fruit of thy loins]

I've had enough of these anxieties and traumas and unanswered questions.  Today with the help of heaven I will walk to the place.  Maybe the Holy Spirit will enter me and I will do it there and then.  If not, maybe tomorrow.  I cannot stand seeing all these white women going off with blacks.  Please forgive me because all of this was serious and I was never joking.  I needed an amount of help no human being could ever give me.  G-d Himself is working all of this and He has done it for His sublime purpose.  I stand in awe of Him and his inexorability.  I wish that He will not treat me harshly in the Next World or forsake me like He did in this one.  My soul craves death.

[mord]

Hold on take a trip to the U.S. i'll find you a blonde woman i know a few.

[Scriabin]

Go to Minnesota...its filled with blond women.

[nessuno]

Come on Fruit - Stop it!
You really have me scared.
If you are not here to post - who will have me rolling my eyes or rolling on the floor with laughter  
You have made very many friends here.
You seem very smart and witty - give yourself a chance with normal people.
Church might be a good place to get help.  Not so much to meet women but who knows both might happen!
Sorry to sound preachy but you are really scaring me!

[Scriabin]

He's just talking. 

He wants attention, and he gets it...by the barrelfull.

[Fruit of thy loins]

I went up to the spot today.  It was very breezy - the wind was blowing in the direction of the jump, but I still did not like it.  And as I approached the peak point, I got those butterflies in my stomach - you know how a shy person might feel when they meet someone they have liked for a while or are going for a job interview and feel anxious? - and so I just sat down.  I looked at it from different points to see which bit was the best to jump from - I would hate to jump off and land on a promontory and end up stuck half-way down.  But I saw plenty of good places to jump from.  I prayed to the G-d in the heavens to fill me up with the right spirit.  I recalled all those times that I have been in a house or somewhere and been so overcome with these horrible feelings (which other people mock in real life - they take pleasure in seeing people like me suffer these problems) - times when I really could have just have got up and done it.  But I couldn't do it there.  I tried any number of rationalizations.  In the end I decided it was the wind that put me off.  I didn't know whether to take a running jump or just stand and will myself over the edge.  Maybe if I do it early enough tomorrow morning, even if I did survive somehow, it would take so long for them to find me that I'd die before they got to me. 

[mord]

Fruit i really do know blonde girls here in the U.S. within 3 miles [about 4 1/2km's] from my house.I know at least 4 in that area.I live with my brother in a big apt 3bd rms you can stay at my and my brothers house .You can find a blond we'll get you a blond

[Scriabin]

Fruit i really do know blonde girls here in the U.S. within 3 miles [about 4 1/2km's] from my house.I know at least 4 in that area.I live with my brother in a big apt 3bd rms you can stay at my and my brothers house .You can find a blond we'll get you a blond

You're offering to let this person stay with you? 

[WestCoastJTF]

I've had enough of these anxieties and traumas and unanswered questions. 

Dude, go see a shrink and get some meds.  Seriously, you sound depressed and it is pointless to suffer needlessly. 

Wallowing in self-pity is really unattractive.  You are probably only one pill away from a normal life.

[Nic Brookes]

Possibly this is in the wrong board... i'm thinking we need a "Fruit comedy" board   

[Scriabin]

Fruit...stay in the here and now.  No past, no future.

Maybe you can become sane this way.

[sat_chit_anand]

Oh mate...

Fruit lives in the same town as me and Yantan. We HAVE to sort this guy out.

Come on Fruit. 

Why don't we meet for drinks?

Yantan wants to meet you and so do I.

[Fruit of thy loins]

Oh mate...

Fruit lives in the same town as me and Yantan. We HAVE to sort this guy out.

Come on Fruit. 

Why don't we meet for drinks?

Yantan wants to meet you and so do I.

I sent you a PM that explains all. 

[WestCoastJTF]

I sent you a PM that explains all. 

What!?  You can't leave the rest of us hanging...

[jdl4ever]

We need to find Fruit an insane blond women suffering from the same insanity that he has (she will think that the blacks are making her kind extinct) and then he will be happy.  They will dance together in front of jealous blacks in the bar and then fruit will have his revenge. 

[Fruit of thy loins]

I want to splat out my brains and escape the evil, vicious hateful people and society I live among.

There are no - let me repeat it, no - serious white women who are opposed to sex with black men.  There are only white women who are still repressed enough to acquiesce to white male paternalism.  This is a sign that our society is not progressive and multicultural enough.  Every attractive white woman demands black men.  That is why my life would only have been misery had I gone on anyway.

Can you fathom it?  Every summer, more and more black devils with huge grins on their faces stalking the streets, touching the flesh of blondes, stroking their long golden hair - and the blondes sigh, and fall in love with them ... meanwhile I am forced, with a tear in my eye, to take two painkillers and go to bed early ... unwanted, pale, flabby, forsaken ... the G-d of the Heavens has treated me like people treat prostitutes, chewed them up and spat them out on the ground.  I am a vile whore in G-d's eyes.

[Shlomo]

the G-d of the Heavens has treated me like people treat prostitutes, chewed them up and spat them out on the ground.  I am a vile whore in G-d's eyes.

Shame on you. This is so wrong. You should be thankful for the good things that you've got. You know... you aren't a muslim in some 3rd world country, you aren't a starving kid in china, you aren't being tortured by some evil dictator, you aren't some african who thinks that rubbing doodoo on yourself is terrific...

Don't you DARE blame G-d. G-d has given you SO MUCH and this is how you talk? It's not "cool" to say that you wish to die when G-d gave you a great and magnificent soul with a unique and beautiful challenge. Your soul is not yours and you DO NOT have the right to take it.

You are a smart and kind hearted kid who is just really angry because stuff isn't working out so good... but you don't solve this by wallowing in self pity. YOU NEED TO GO PICK UP YOUR BIBLE AND START READING.

Go do this now. Your soul is thirsty and you aren't feeding it. I guarantee that if you'll go and start reading the Bible, that everything will make more sense... you will start to think about the bigger picture... and you will know what you are supposed to do and where you are going. The more you read, the better. This is what you need. This is what we ALL need when we feel overwhelmed or helpless. Go read Psalms for a while.

[nessuno]

the G-d of the Heavens has treated me like people treat prostitutes, chewed them up and spat them out on the ground.  I am a vile whore in G-d's eyes.

Shame on you. This is so wrong. You should be thankful for the good things that you've got. You know... you aren't a muslim in some 3rd world country, you aren't a starving kid in china, you aren't being tortured by some evil dictator, you aren't some african who thinks that rubbing doodoo on yourself is terrific...

Don't you DARE blame G-d. G-d has given you SO MUCH and this is how you talk? It's not "cool" to say that you wish to die when G-d gave you a great and magnificent soul with a unique and beautiful challenge. Your soul is not yours and you DO NOT have the right to take it.

You are a smart and kind hearted kid who is just really angry because stuff isn't working out so good... but you don't solve this by wallowing in self pity. YOU NEED TO GO PICK UP YOUR BIBLE AND START READING.

Go do this now. Your soul is thirsty and you aren't feeding it. I guarantee that if you'll go and start reading the Bible, that everything will make more sense... you will start to think about the bigger picture... and you will know what you are supposed to do and where you are going. The more you read, the better. This is what you need. This is what we ALL need when we feel overwhelmed or helpless. Go read Psalms for a while.

Sorry jeffguy - your advice makes too much sense for Fruit to listen too!  
I think we should all chip in and get him a big violin.
Then he could add some music to his repeated tale of woe.