Author Topic: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here  (Read 2667 times)

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Offline Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks

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Re: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here
« Reply #1 on: June 30, 2007, 02:07:26 AM »
I believe they are hilarious, but alas, I have dialup.  >:(

So here's something funny and low-tech:

Q: Why did the Muslim cross the road?

A: Because his member was stuck in the chicken!

Offline Ehud

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Re: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here
« Reply #2 on: June 30, 2007, 03:43:47 AM »
What does the sign say above the nursery in a Palestinian maternity ward?

"Live ammunition."
"The Jews will eventually have to face up to what you're dealing with here.  The arabs will never love you for what good you've brought them.  They don't know how to really love.  But hate!  Oh, G-d, can they hate!  And they have a deep, deep, deep resentment because you have jolted them from their delusions of grandeur and shown them for what they are-a decadent, savage people controlled by a religion that has stripped them of all human ambition . . . except for the few cruel enough and arrogant enough to command them as one commands a mob of sheep.  You are dealing with a mad society and you'd better learn how to control it."

-Excerpt from The Haj by Leon Uris

newman

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Re: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here
« Reply #3 on: June 30, 2007, 03:46:35 AM »
What do moslem girls ask thei mothers?



"mom, when achmed blows up, can I have his room?"

Boeregeneraal

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Re: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here
« Reply #4 on: June 30, 2007, 05:00:39 AM »
The kidney is from a Jew (episode 1)  hahahahahahahahahah  - now thats a good one.

Have you all heard of the Iranian Plane Joke ???

newman

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Re: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here
« Reply #5 on: June 30, 2007, 05:03:13 AM »
no. do tell :)

Boeregeneraal

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Re: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here
« Reply #6 on: June 30, 2007, 05:10:58 AM »
The Iranian Airplane

The captain of an Iranian airliner broadcasts in a bind, "This is Iranian Airlines Flight 174 announcing we have lost an engine and wish to land at any airport in the Mideast OTHER than Israel."

No answer.

A short while later he announces, "This is Iranian Airlines Flight 174. We have lost TWO engines and ask permission to land at any airport in the Mideast OTHER than Israel."

No answer from anyone.

A while later the pilot announces, "This is Iranian Airlines Flight 174. We are in desperate need of help. We have lost three engines and need permission to land at any airport in the Mideast OTHER than Israel.

Still no answer.

Finally, the Captain calls, "Mayday, mayday! This is Iranian Airlines Flight 174, we have only one engine left and it is failing. Unless we can land we are going to crash. We need permission to land at ANY airport in the Mideast, INCLUDING Israel.

Immediately a voice is heard in the Iranian cockpit: "This is the Tel Aviv Airport Tower calling Iranian Airlines Flight 174. We would be delighted to help."

"God bless you," said the Iranian pilot, "what should we do sir?"

The Tel Aviv Airport control tower operator says, "Repeat after me: Yitgadal, v'yitgadash ...."

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Can someone that is Hebrew, PLEASE explain to the others, what  Yitgadal, v'yitgadash ....  means-hahaha

newman

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Re: And Now Something Funny To Lighten Things Up Here
« Reply #7 on: June 30, 2007, 05:19:03 AM »
classic :laugh: :laugh: