Any advice?

[ChabadKahanist]

Every time my mother comes into town my wife complains why we don't for kebab or al haesh (flame cooked) I tell her it's my mother she comes into Israel once or twice a year to visit my,my daughter & my grandchildren & we want American food not the Arab food which has been adopted as Israeli.
I said if your mother takes us out we will have mideastern food but when  mine comes in we want standard American/Ashkenazi menu.
Am I wrong?

[Dr. Dan]

Your mother is a guest. So you're right.

May your arguments with your wife only be about this.

[ChabadKahanist]

Your mother is a guest. So you're right.

May your arguments with your wife only be about this.

My mother doesn't care what type of of food it is my daughter & I that want davka American or Ashkenazi food.
We do generally deli or burger joints.
I just said if you want mideastern crap you are welcome to stay home but my daughter & I want American food to which my daughter says Tatty why are you so mean to which I reply I am not being mean I am just being pushy so I get what I want.
She then is cool but every year the same deal.
Imagine we went to a Chinese restaurant & my wife asked for pita & chumous & techina.
This is our biggest arguement.
I don't eat deli the rest of year so once a year I can have what I enjoy as can my daughter.

[mord]

I'm Askanazi and i love Mizrachi food it very good and tasty.It's better and you have a bigger variety then in restaurants if youknow someone who cokoks it i have 2 friends who have parents who cook it .They can cook a little as well.

[ChabadKahanist]

I'm Askanazi and i love Mizrachi food it very good and tasty.It's better and you have a bigger variety then in restaurants if youknow someone who cokoks it i have 2 friends who have parents who cook it .They can cook a little as well.

That is the problem I eat Mizrachi food the whole year when I am with my my mother & kids I want Ashkenazi food or kosher Italian or kosher Chinese.

[Kahane-Was-Right BT]

Perfectly reasonable to switch things up a few times a year.

Do not give arabs credit for middle eastern food.  The middle east long predates the presence of arabs there.

[Kahane-Was-Right BT]

Maybe your wife is hurt by your attitude.  If your mother doesn't care which food, why do you and your daughter INSIST on ashkenazi food when she comes over?  Maybe your wife feels that you consider her cooking and food not good enough and you are ashamed of her cooking because you want to change it whenever your mother comes.  Add that to the fact that you derisively call it "arab food" and I can see why she may be feeling insecure from your actions and her resistance stems from that, not because she opposes a kosher italian meal once in a blue moon.   Just a thought.

Lol ok you are calling it "crap" too.  When your daughter asks why you are being mean, it is because you are.  Try a better way to resolve this and account for your wife's feelings.

[ChabadKahanist]

Maybe your wife is hurt by your attitude.  If your mother doesn't care which food, why do you and your daughter INSIST on ashkenazi food when she comes over?  Maybe your wife feels that you consider her cooking and food not good enough and you are ashamed of her cooking because you want to change it whenever your mother comes.  Add that to the fact that you derisively call it "arab food" and I can see why she may be feeling insecure from your actions and her resistance stems from that, not because she opposes a kosher italian meal once in a blue moon.   Just a thought.

No the issue is about restaurants when my mother comes my daughter & I want our kind of food once a year & don't want to go to a mid-eastern type restaurant.
If we were eating at home I have no preference.
Not at all she cant see why  we Americans like deli,hot dogs & burgers & can't understand why we don't want to go for kebabs & on the fire.
My mother treats us to restaurants when she comes & being that is my mother paying for it it should be my daughter & I who decide what type of food we eat.
For once a year she can let me have my way & have what I enjoy & miss since coming here.

[Dr. Dan]

How about go to a Persian restaurant in Israel (if one exists)... of course it's kabab and "crap", but still yummy.

[ChabadKahanist]

How about go to a Persian restaurant in Israel (if one exists)... of course it's kabab and "crap", but still yummy.

I haven't seen any.
I saw an Ethiopian one but I wouldn't eat there because there is no teuda.

[Dr. Dan]

I haven't seen any.
I saw an Ethiopian one but I wouldn't eat there because there is no teuda.

Haven't had deli coldcuts in 5 years.

[ChabadKahanist]

Haven't had deli coldcuts in 5 years.

I only eat it once a year cholestrol & salt you know.