Jewish Redneck Jokes and some fun pictures!

[REDNECK JEW]

You Might be a Jewish Redneck if:

 - You think that "KKK" means really really Kosher
 - You have a gun rack in your Sukkah
 - The only area on your lawn that is mowed is where you burned your Chametz
 - You have ever fired a gun to the sound of Haman's name
 - You know what Barach to say when you see a UFO
 - You know which brand of grit is Kosher
 - You think that a hora is a high priced call girl
 - You wear cowboy boots to shul
 - Your favorite Passover snack is spam on a sandwhich
 - You don't ride on Shabbat because your car is up on blocks
 - Your favorite beverage is a combination of Manischewitz and Mountain Dew, also called "Mountain Jew"
 - You're disappointed when your son tells you he wants to be a doctor or a lawyer, and not a NASCAR driver
 - You think Dolly Parton should have the lead role in Yentl
 - You try to catch catfish with Matza Balls
 - Gefitle fish is the most solid thing you can eat with your tooth
 - Your yard has car parts lying around to Volvo's, BMW's, and Camry's
 - Making your first deer is part of your Bar Mitzva's right of passage
 - You use a fiddle and a banjo to play Hava Nagila
 - You know that Santa Clause and the Elves must be Jewish. Who else would work on Christmas Eve?
- Your Seder plate has a picture of Elvis on it.
 - You open the door for Elijah at Passover and have to chase away possums.
 - You turn off your bug zapper on Friday night.
 - Your Menorah is electric and has bug light bulbs in it.
 - You use dynamite in the pond to get gefilte fish.
 - You request your Rabbi to certify roadkill as kosher.
 - You know how to play Hava Nagila and Hatikva on the banjo.
 - “Larry the Mohel Guy” ‘nuff said.
 - You use leftover matzoth as skeet targets.
 - Your yarmulke says “John Deere” or “NASCAR” on it, or has fishing lures stuck in it.
 - Your tallis is made from camouflage cloth.
 - Your hunting dogs are circumcised and answer to the names of Moshe, Shmuel and Yakob.
 - You serve matzoth ball soup in old Cool Whip containers.
 - You play drinking games with your dreidel.
 - You had a combination Bar or Bat Mitzvah and Wedding.
 - Your Chupah was a blue plastic tarp from Wal-Mart.
 - You wrote your own Ketubah with permanent marker.
- You order latkes at the local waffle house.
- You painted over letters on your Toyota tailgate so it now says OY.
- Your synagogue used to have wheels, but now it’s up on blocks.
- At Passover, a guy named Elijah really does show up.
- You hunted game to make your own tefilin and gave the rest of the hide to the local scribe for new Torah scroll material.













This last picture I found on a web page had me in laughing so hard I thought It was so insane too see...LOL Y'all ain't in Brooklyn anymore!!!

[REDNECK JEW]

I thought for sure this post would get some of you laughing, a good break from the insanity that is the Progressive Left's encroachment on our G-d given Constitutional Rights

[Zelhar]

Is it politically correct for a non-southerner to use the r-word ?

[REDNECK JEW]

LOL either that is another joke to add to this line up, or if your serious in your question, I can tell you that Up State NY, NH, and Maine have a ton of Northern Rednecks, sadly due to Agenda 21 most of Yankee Rednecks have to travel south to take their trucks and Jeeps rock crawling and swamp mudding these days.

The number of Up State New Yorkers moving to Dixie States is who want to live in FREE AMERICA has been incredible this past year!

We welcome these people with open arms, all we ask is that they leave the politics that caused them to move to the Deep South back in the states from where they have relocated from to escape tyranny! Trust me they are very happy to do so.   

[Zelhar]

I just want to make sure redneck isn't as charged a word as the n-word or the k-word. On TV usually when the word redneck is mentioned it seems somewhat derogatory and condescending, i.e "I will find some rednecks to sell them this crap" (implying they are people with low standards that can be tricked into buying crap). The word "hillbilly" seems to have similar meaning but for a different geographic location I think. On the other hand I see people who casually identify themselves as rednecks  without any inferiority complex.