I can explain this one easily. I'm going to talk about the extremes to make a point. If you are wise, you will listen...
Usually first, women hook up with whimp boy who has no spine, always says yes, is jealous about everything (which says I don't trust you), is needy, tells his life's problems before she can even talk, NEGATIVE, NEGATIVE, NEGATIVE, tries to buy her love, takes her out to the most expensive place in town on the first date, calls her on the phone every single day to check on her, asks her if she likes him (this is SO LAME and NOT confident!), and comes off manipulative and insecure. Whimp boy thinks it's a good idea to tell her every insecurity he's ever had and gets hurt when she doesn't look at him just right. He tells her he loves her on the 1st or 2nd date and she thinks to herself "he doesn't even know me! CREEPY!" After a while, she feels no challenge and feels grossed out. She can't love and respect someone like this. She knows she wants a strong man... she tells him she just wants to be friends. He stalks her for several weeks and grovels and begs her to come back. He thinks that attraction is a choice... it's not. You can't talk a woman into loving you.
So she looks for the opposite and finds macho boy. Macho boy always says no, is also jealous, NEGATIVE, NEGATIVE, NEGATIVE, abusive, angry, possessive, needy, sometimes a stalker, and comes off manipulative and insecure. Macho boy's problem stems from the belly of pride and ego. He wants to control her and no one likes being controlled. She can't stand this either... but she thinks to herself... at least he's strong and can protect me, unlike whimp boy.
What women REALLY want is a balance. They want a strong man that says yes when he means it and no when he means it, is POSITIVE, confident, is not jealous, DOESN'T LOSE HIS TEMPER because he's in control of himself, KNOWS HE IS THE PRIZE, is interesting and has hobbies (because his entire universe doesn't revolve around her), let's her do most of the talking (men are supposed to be more quiet, duh) and LISTENS, has a sense of humor, is playful and teases her a little sometimes, affectionate but not needy, makes her feel feminine, and acts like a man. This is common sense - which a lot of men don't seem to have in this day and age. Prince Charming never rode up on the white horse and said "Why do you love me?". The confident man says "I love you" when he proposes... because it means more and she takes this more seriously.
RECAP:
Whimp boy - always says yes (even when it's a lie so she'll like him) and the foundation of his problem is insecurity.
Macho boy - always says no (because no one is gonna rule him!) and the foundation of his problem is insecurity.
The balanced man is the one HEALTHY and SANE women want. While there are always going to be a few crazies... the majority of women want a man with BALANCE. Whimp boy turns their stomach and macho boy breaks their heart. That's NOT what they want.
Some guys are so busy looking to put all the blame on women (because their ego can't take personal responsibility), they can't even see some serious mistakes they make and rob themselves from love and happiness.
The men who can't handle this truth, have ego problems.
Confidence comes from loving yourself... loving yourself can only come from respecting yourself... respecting yourself can only come from doing right. This is real strength and is attractive.
Spend more time in the Torah, practice self control and patience, be thankful for the good things that you have (it's called being positive), take showers and comb your hair, do what G-d says... and you will be the type of man that women want... a STRONG man has self-control instead of trying to control others.
Topic: Something for Chaim: Do Women Like Dating Jerks? (Read 2444 times)