1.What's the difference between Obama and a bouncy castle?
You dont take your shoes off to jump on Obama!
2.Obama walks into a bar with a pig.
The bar man shouts "Oy, you can't bring that in here!"
To which the pig replies, "sorry mate, it won't happen again."
3.What's the difference between a park bench and a Obama?
The Bench is the only thing that can support a family.
4.When Barack Obama met his wife-to-be, Michelle, it was love at first sight. Barack loved her beautiful black mane, her chocolate skin and her deep brown eyes. She loved his golden glow, his dashing smile, and his long, slim physique.
Barack proposed to Michelle on their first date. Before she accepted, she expressed her concerns: "This is all happening so quickly, Barack! We - We hardly know anything about each other!"
He reassured her: "I don't care about the past. As far as I'm concerned, my life didn't begin until I met you. Besides, learning about each other as we go through life will only draw us closer."
So she said yes, they were married the same day, and they went on a lovely honeymoon cruise. Lounging around the ship's swimming pool and sipping daiquiris all day, and remaining in their cabin from dusk 'til dawn, the newlyweds were inseparable.
While sunning themselves at the pool one afternoon, Barack climbed to the diving board, waved to Michelle, and then executed a perfect reverse one and a half somersaults with three and a half twists, in the Free position, slipping into the water with nary a splash.
Michelle's mouth hung open. When he rejoined her, she begged to know where he had learned to dive like that. Barack smiled warmly, "Why, my darling, I was a Silver Medalist in the Men's High Dive at the last Summer Olympics." Michelle beamed proudly at her surprising groom.
A little while later, Michelle decided to take a dip in the pool, too. As Barack watched in astonishment, his new bride plowed through the water like a motorboat, with perfect form and strong, consistent, graceful strokes. After 30 laps, Michelle bounded out of the pool, barely breathing hard, and returned to Barack's side.
Welling with pride, he took her hand and kissed her: "Michelle, that was simply amazing! Such power, such grace, such endurance! Where on earth did you learn to swim like that?"
And she says: "Well, honey, I used to be a whore in St. Louis, and I worked both sides of the river."