1. You refine heroin for a living, but have a moral objection to beer.
2. You own a $3000. Machine gun and $5000. Rocket Launcher, but you can not afford shoes.
3. You have more wives than teeth.
4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon "unclean".
5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
6. You can't think of anyone you HAVEN'T declared jihad against.
7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have other uses than setting off roadside bombs.
9. You've often uttered the phrase, "I love what you've done with your cave.".
10. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.
11. You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.
12. You have a crush on your neighbor's goat.
Topic: You might be Taliban if..... (Read 705 times)