Author Topic: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress  (Read 3899 times)

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Offline Maccabi

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"Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« on: April 12, 2007, 07:26:04 PM »
Environmental Prophet Al Gore warned a stunned Congress today of the dire consequences should we puny humans refuse to obey him. Hurricanes. Tornadoes. Earthquakes. Plagues of locusts. Disoriented manatees. Cats and dogs living together. The deliberate and systematic destruction of all life on Arrakis. Terrifying, indeed – but just a taste of what’s in store for us all should we continue to blatantly defy Gore. The time has come to cleanse ourselves of our capitalistic sins and save the earth from total obliteration - but it won’t be easy. Preserving the future for our children will involve tough choices and personal sacrifice. Most importantly it will require tax increases, wealth restribution, government control of production, and the abandonment of the free market system – by pure coincidence, the exact same things liberal democrats have been calling for since before global warming was ever an issue. It would be sheer madness, then, for Repugs to continue to stand against such bold initiatives now that the scientific consensus is that we're all going to die unless we do exactly as Al Gore says. So there's really no point in debating it any further.

http://blamebush.typepad.com/blamebush/

Offline Maccabi

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2007, 07:55:16 PM »
this was humor. I agree with everything you're saying.

ftf

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2007, 08:01:48 PM »
G-d brings hurricanes. Humans can't prevent them. They can only be prevented by not cursing Israel. Hurricane Katrina was a punishment for America cursing Israel.


God can control hurricanes, but they are naturally caused by certain distributions of high and low pressure, which in turn can be effected by the temperature.

Offline MassuhDGoodName

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2007, 08:24:02 PM »
In all seriousness, I feel that choosing death hasn't been given a fair hearing.

How can one decide something important without first hearing all of the facts?


ftf

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2007, 08:24:54 PM »
I personally think that we need to do something about the environment, but redistributing wealth? What has that got to do with it?

Offline Maccabi

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2007, 08:26:40 PM »
guys this is satire. thought it would be amusing.
 :) ;) :D ;D >:( :( :o 8) ??? ::) :P :-[ :-X :-\ :'(

Offline Zionist Revolutionary

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #6 on: April 12, 2007, 08:29:44 PM »
Global Warming humor always amuses me.

ftf

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #7 on: April 12, 2007, 08:30:28 PM »
guys this is satire. thought it would be amusing.
 :) ;) :D ;D >:( :( :o 8) ??? ::) :P :-[ :-X :-\ :'(
I always presume news articles are actual news until told otherwise.

Offline Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #8 on: April 12, 2007, 08:52:46 PM »
It certainly is telling that Katrina predominantly harmed militant, hateful blacks (who are the least likely of Americans to respect Jews).

Offline MassuhDGoodName

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #9 on: April 12, 2007, 10:58:25 PM »
Re:  "...guys this is satire. thought it would be amusing..."

Whah?!

but...but...but....!

!   :o

Offline RationalThought110

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #10 on: April 17, 2007, 01:01:57 PM »
G-d brings hurricanes. Humans can't prevent them. They can only be prevented by not cursing Israel. Hurricane Katrina was a punishment for America cursing Israel.




Why do countries like North Korea never get punished?

Offline RationalThought110

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #11 on: April 17, 2007, 01:07:48 PM »
G-d brings hurricanes. Humans can't prevent them. They can only be prevented by not cursing Israel. Hurricane Katrina was a punishment for America cursing Israel.


G-d can control hurricanes, but they are naturally caused by certain distributions of high and low pressure, which in turn can be effected by the temperature.


You believe in what Gore says?

ftf

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Re: "Obey Me, or Die" Gore Warns Congress
« Reply #12 on: April 17, 2007, 01:12:47 PM »
I don't actually know what Gore says, I've never listened to him speak or read any of his articles. I'm just citing what I learnt in Geography lessons.