Rape Ranked as Third Most Popular Sexual Fantasy for Women

[Confederate Kahanist]

http://www.care2.com/causes/womens-rights/blog/rape-ranked-as-third-most-popular-sexual-fantasy-for-women/



In my mind the words rape and fantasy do not go together – ever. To me these two words could not be more opposite.

That's why I was shocked, not to mention highly offended, when I came across a top 10 list of female sex fantasies from askmen.com that ranked rape as the third most popular sexual fantasy for women.

Rape, a sexual fantasy for women? Is this some sort of sick joke?

Apparently not. According to askmen.com: "These female sex fantasies usually involve a gorgeous man carrying her off to his bedroom and quickly getting down to business. She'll protest as he tears her clothing off and expertly arouses her body, but on the inside, she'll love every minute of it. This continues to the point of penetration, and leads her to an incredible orgasm despite her earlier protests."

This description of a fantasy rape is problematic for many reasons. First, the description glamorizes rape as a satisfying sexual experience where the attacker is a gorgeous sex expert and the victim enjoys  "every minute of it." Luckily I have never been raped, but I imagine that many survivors would disagree with this assessment.

Secondly, the description explicitly states a woman's protest and the attacker's complete disregard for her pleas for him to stop. We've heard it time and time again - "No means no!" - but in this instance "no" is ignored and ends with "an incredible orgasm."
 
This depiction of rape is very dangerous. It paints a picture of rape as an enjoyable experience that women crave even if they protest or say no. This type of message creates a huge miscommunication between the sexes in the bedroom. Men may end up thinking that a woman's doesn't mean it when she says "no" to sex and that by ignoring her requests he is really appealing to a sexual fantasy of hers, but without consent what he is really doing is raping her.

Anouk Collins at The Frisky shares her story of how this type of miscommunication can go horribly wrong. Collins had shared with her boyfriend her fantasy of going beyond "being dominated and playing the innocent who secretly wasn't" to what she considered the "final frontier— a simulated rape." She knew, however, that she would never act out the fantasy with her partner without having a conversation with him first about "safe words and boundaries."

That conversation, however, never happened and one night things went terribly wrong. Collins recalls:

"As he crawled on top of me, I rather sternly informed him that I didn't want to have sex with him. To my horror, he got a menacing look on his face and ignored my protests. I knew after a few misguided attempts to block him from entering me that he thought what was happening was drastically different from what I knew to be taking place. To him, this was the fantasy I'd been talking about. To me, it was not. The problem, of course, was that since we'd never discussed it, his decision to enact it without any prior dialogue, without my consent, robbed me of the control that would've made it a rape fantasy rather than an out-and-out rape." (emphasis mine)

And herein lies the problem of glamorizing rape as a popular female fantasy – consent, consent, consent!  Teaching men to ignore women's protests during sex doesn't fulfill a woman's sexual fantasy – it teaches men to rape women. And what's worse? It opens the door for further victim blaming and claims that women "really wanted it" or were "asking for it" when they actually meant "no" when they said it.

This isn't to say that fantasizing about sex is wrong. In fact, a study in the Journal of Sex Research analyzed 20 studies on sexual fantasies in the last 30 years and estimated that 31-57 percent of women have so-called rape fantasies (that is a whole other story for another day), but sexual fantasies, whatever they may be, are built on feeling safe and in control (or at least they should be) – none of which are true when a woman is actually raped.

Sadly, Collins can't help but partially blame herself for what happened to her because she she says she didn't explain her boundaries to her boyfriend in time, but saying "no" should have been enough.

What do you think about the askmen.com poll?

[Chaim Ben Pesach]

בס''ד

The purpose of this phony "poll" is to cater to the sick fantasies not of women, but of evil men who dream of committing rape for a whole variety of demented reasons.

Violent rapists should be executed.

[Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks]

בס''ד

The purpose of this phony "poll" is to cater to the sick fantasies not of women, but of evil men who dream of committing rape for a whole variety of demented reasons.

Violent rapists should be executed.

Yes, absolutely.

But there are many mentally ill women out there who always seek out abusive men--they only date or marry batterers, even if genuinely great guys are available. Women are biologically programmed to seek out the alpha-male (because children with him are more likely to be successfully cared for), and in the minds of some insane women, abusers, because of how "tough" and "macho" they are, are the most dominant males around.

[~Hanna~]

I think we should be calling the abusive men, insane and evil, not DV victims. No women that I have ever met, "sought out" abusive men.

בס''ד

The purpose of this phony "poll" is to cater to the sick fantasies not of women, but of evil men who dream of committing rape for a whole variety of demented reasons.

Violent rapists should be executed.

Yes, absolutely.

But there are many mentally ill women out there who always seek out abusive men--they only date or marry batterers, even if genuinely great guys are available. Women are biologically programmed to seek out the alpha-male (because children with him are more likely to be successfully cared for), and in the minds of some insane women, abusers, because of how "tough" and "macho" they are, are the most dominant males around.

[Rubystars]

You should never blame the victim of an attack. Some women and even some men are programmed to seek out abusive or toxic partners though, so Dr. Brennan Fan is right about that part. This is something they need to work out with God's help and possibly a psychologist or counselor. Regardless of that though, men have no right to abuse women and women have no right to abuse men.

[Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks]

You should never blame the victim of an attack. Some women and even some men are programmed to seek out abusive or toxic partners though, so Dr. Brennan Fan is right about that part. This is something they need to work out with G-d's help and possibly a psychologist or counselor. Regardless of that though, men have no right to abuse women and women have no right to abuse men.

Nowhere did I imply that abuse that happens because one partner, in their mental illness, seeks out an abusive partner is less severe or needs to be punished less harshly. But I think we're all being PC if we deny that the purposeful selection of batterers, whether conscious or not, is a big problem (especially for women). I say especially for women for two reasons--the first being that battery from a woman is much less likely to result in serious injury than that from a man (except for Elin on Tiger Woods, lol), and the second being that men very rarely have an innate desire or instinct to be dominated or controlled. Like I said before, I think that women seeking out batterers is a perversion of a pretty universal female animal instinct.

[✡ Hindu Zionist ॐ]

בס''ד

The purpose of this phony "poll" is to cater to the sick fantasies not of women, but of evil men who dream of committing rape for a whole variety of demented reasons.

Violent rapists should be executed.

I feel the person who came up with this article/study should be executed too.

[Aces High]

Women don't want to be raped.   I don't care what the article says.

[IsraeliGovtAreKapos]

                                                                         בס"ד

Arab female monsters love it.

[The One and Only Mo]

"Where have you gone Joe DiMaggio? A nation turns its lonely eyes to you...woo woo woo. What's that you say, Mrs. Robinson? Joltin' Joe has left and gone away."

What happened to old fashioned values,morals, and standards. Society has become so FFFFUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKEEEEDDDDD up that women fantasize about being raped    Bring back the good ol' days.

[Dr. Dan]

And when that "fantasy" comes true they'll realize the stupidity of it all. Some people are just degenerate!

[syyuge]

בס''ד

The purpose of this phony "poll" is to cater to the sick fantasies not of women, but of evil men who dream of committing rape for a whole variety of demented reasons.

Violent rapists should be executed.

I feel the person who came up with this article/study should be executed too.

Freudians have distorted the world in various ways. This is just one of them.

[Irish Zionist]

בס''ד

The purpose of this phony "poll" is to cater to the sick fantasies not of women, but of evil men who dream of committing rape for a whole variety of demented reasons.

Violent rapists should be executed.

ALL rapists should be executed. I never have heard of a "non violent" rape.

[angryChineseKahanist]

I could never imagine rape. I don't like violence and cruelty.
You'd have to multiply my testosterone level that of a jigger beast.
Just who did they ask anyway?

[The One and Only Mo]

בס''ד

The purpose of this phony "poll" is to cater to the sick fantasies not of women, but of evil men who dream of committing rape for a whole variety of demented reasons.

Violent rapists should be executed.

ALL rapists should be executed. I never have heard of a "non violent" rape.

I think violent in this context was not only an adjective but part of the noun. In other words ALL rapists ARE violent.

[Confederate Kahanist]

                                                                         בס"ד

Arab female monsters love it.

Arab female beasts who smells like a camel .

[christians4jews]

probably a black that wants to glamorise their hobbies...

[Spiraling Leopard]

This is an evil poll.
Rape is unwanted. If a woman secretly still would want it, it isn't rape. It would be an imaginary roleplay.

The author of this article should be executed.

[Lisa]

First off, I don't understand the reason for posting such an article here.

Secondly, I just skimmed the article, which references the website Askmen.com.  This Askmen.com is an evil, misogynist site.  For example, they once ran an article about why men should never get involved with virgin women.  Their reasoning was that if the woman was saving herself, she would be too needy, and seek a commitment.  Apparently, the authors of Askmen.com want nothing to do with any woman who hasn't been "broken in" properly (pun intended). 

[~Hanna~]

Same here...

First off, I don't understand the reason for posting such an article here.

Secondly, I just skimmed the article, which references the website Askmen.com.  This Askmen.com is an evil, misogynist site.  For example, they once ran an article about why men should never get involved with virgin women.  Their reasoning was that if the woman was saving herself, she would be too needy, and seek a commitment.  Apparently, the authors of Askmen.com want nothing to do with any woman who hasn't been "broken in" properly (pun intended). 

[Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks]

First off, I don't understand the reason for posting such an article here.

Secondly, I just skimmed the article, which references the website Askmen.com.  This Askmen.com is an evil, misogynist site.  For example, they once ran an article about why men should never get involved with virgin women.  Their reasoning was that if the woman was saving herself, she would be too needy, and seek a commitment.  Apparently, the authors of Askmen.com want nothing to do with any woman who hasn't been "broken in" properly (pun intended). 

I have noticed that people who hate women are invariably Nazis.

[Mishmaat]

What kind of degenerates participated in this poll?

[Irish Zionist]

What kind of degenerates participated in this poll?

Rapists, Loners, Deadbeats, Blacks, Arabs, *cough Wiegang cough*, Wife abusers, Queer's, 40 year old virgins, Pedophiles. I'm sure there's more but these are the majority.

[Lewinsky Stinks, Dr. Brennan Rocks]

Don't forget the ever-charming Ahmad613.

[Irish Zionist]

Don't forget the ever-charming Ahmad613.

Who is that or will I regret asking?