Author Topic: No way is chaim 50!!!  (Read 2709 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline christian_love

  • Junior JTFer
  • **
  • Posts: 85
No way is chaim 50!!!
« on: May 28, 2007, 06:55:51 PM »
I was lsitening to his question and answers about marriedge and he said he was 50, the dude looks about 34.

Is he joking when he says hes 50?

Offline Ehud

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 2476
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #1 on: May 28, 2007, 07:47:35 PM »
Yeah, I couldn't believe that when I first heard it but it's true.  I hope I'll end up looking that good when I'm 50.
"The Jews will eventually have to face up to what you're dealing with here.  The arabs will never love you for what good you've brought them.  They don't know how to really love.  But hate!  Oh, G-d, can they hate!  And they have a deep, deep, deep resentment because you have jolted them from their delusions of grandeur and shown them for what they are-a decadent, savage people controlled by a religion that has stripped them of all human ambition . . . except for the few cruel enough and arrogant enough to command them as one commands a mob of sheep.  You are dealing with a mad society and you'd better learn how to control it."

-Excerpt from The Haj by Leon Uris

Offline DownwithIslam

  • Ultimate JTFer
  • *******
  • Posts: 4247
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #2 on: May 28, 2007, 10:21:22 PM »
Well he has extremely low badyfat and that always has a positive effect on a persons appearance and health.
I am urinating on a Koran.

Offline Bodhi

  • Full JTFer
  • ***
  • Posts: 136
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2007, 01:17:51 PM »
  He eats, and lives Kosher, he's got another 70 good years left in him  ;D

Offline Mifletzet

  • Senior JTFer
  • ****
  • Posts: 307
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #4 on: May 29, 2007, 06:32:13 PM »
Plus Chaim being virginal and unmarried means that he can focus undistracted his energies on his Divine mission.

Sometimes Hashem does not send a man a woman or children, as he has an even more important tafkid on Earth than pru u'revu, and a female and squalling brats would only be an intolerable determent and interference!

It has been shown that the only way rats can be made to live longer and healthier is to minimize their intake of food and sex. Presumably the same with humans!

Offline TheCoon

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 2081
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #5 on: May 29, 2007, 06:48:16 PM »
Chaim never said he was a virgin, at least I never heard him say that. It's not something I'd put in a guy's mouth.

But yah, he looks absolutely excellent for someone his age.
The city isn't what it used to be. It all happened so fast. Everything went to crap. It's like... everyone's sense of morals just disappeared. Bad economy made things worse. Jobs started drying up, then the stores had to shut down. Then a black man was elected president. He was supposed to change things. He didn't. More and more people turned to crime and violence... The town becomes gripped with fear. Dark times, dark times... I am the hero this town needs. I am... The Coon!!!

Offline Mifletzet

  • Senior JTFer
  • ****
  • Posts: 307
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #6 on: May 29, 2007, 08:37:59 PM »
Sex out of wedlock with a Jewess, that doesn't lead to marriage, for a Torah Jew, is something that is frowned on upon Halachically.

An unmarried old bochur who has kept himself pure and virginal should be proud of his virginity. The Zohar Chadash says that if a man has reached 50 unmarried, provided that he has guarded his bris, will have a special power that those whom he curses will be smitten.

Those born 1956-57 are known to be a special lot astrologically, and are Men of Destiny: Osama bin Laden, Ahmedinajad, Sarkozy, Bruce Willis, Tom Hanks, Chaim......!
« Last Edit: May 29, 2007, 08:42:53 PM by Mifletzet »

Offline kahaneloyalist

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 1959
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #7 on: May 29, 2007, 09:23:57 PM »
Chaim admitted during a old Ask JTF that he had been with women
"For it is through the mercy of fools that all Justice is lost"
Ramban

Offline Mifletzet

  • Senior JTFer
  • ****
  • Posts: 307
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #8 on: May 29, 2007, 10:02:12 PM »
Talmud Shabbat 156 gives two opinions:

If a Jew is worthy then אין מזל לישראל and he is above the Zodiac, and subject to Hashem's direct hashgochoh.

If a Jew is unworthy, then יש מזל לישראל and he is subject to the predestined vagaries of the heavenly bodies.

We like to believe that we are in the former state, and therefore the Halacha is that we don't consult horoscopes today (modern astrology is a pale, largely erroneous shadow of what the ancient astrologers knew).
« Last Edit: May 29, 2007, 10:06:50 PM by Mifletzet »

Offline mord

  • Global Moderator
  • Platinum JTF Member
  • *
  • Posts: 25853
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #9 on: May 29, 2007, 10:06:37 PM »
Talmud Shabbat 156 gives two opinions:

If a Jew is worthy then אין מזל לישראל and he is above the Zodiac, and subject to Hashem's direct hashgochoh.

If a Jew is unworthy, then יש מזל לישראל and he is subject to the predestined vagaries of the heavenly bodies.
Yes i read that somewhere myself
Thy destroyers and they that make thee waste shall go forth of thee.  Isaiah 49:17

 
Shot at 2010-01-03

Offline OdKahaneChai

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 1794
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #10 on: May 29, 2007, 10:30:11 PM »
Talmud Shabbat 156 gives two opinions:

If a Jew is worthy then אין מזל לישראל and he is above the Zodiac, and subject to Hashem's direct hashgochoh.

If a Jew is unworthy, then יש מזל לישראל and he is subject to the predestined vagaries of the heavenly bodies.

We like to believe that we are in the former state, and therefore the Halacha is that we don't consult horoscopes today (modern astrology is a pale, largely erroneous shadow of what the ancient astrologers knew).
The Rambam's letter on astrology:
http://people.bu.edu/dklepper/RN242/rambam2.html

One does not deal with terrorists; one does not bargain with terrorists; one kills terrorists.
- Rabbi Meir Kahane ZT"L, HY"D

Offline Daniel

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 1966
Re: No way is chaim 50!!!
« Reply #11 on: May 29, 2007, 11:19:42 PM »
Chaim takes great care of himself and it certainly shows! I have disagreements and mixed feelings over a lot of what Chaim has to say. But the one thing I'm completely sold on is the salmon salad! :)

In regards to astrology, there are certainly Jews that believe in it. I know, I've met plenty of them. I think it would be more accurate to say that "Judaism" doesn't believe in Astrology. I, personally, don't believe in astrology. I sometimes make the joke that I wonder if it's a typical character trait of an Aries to be skeptical of all this stuff.