Author Topic: The Aisle Seat  (Read 2764 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline Muck DeFuslims

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 1070
The Aisle Seat
« on: July 18, 2007, 10:45:46 PM »
The Aisle Seat

Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat...

Just before takeoff, a Marine sat down in the aisle seat. After takeoff, the Marine kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said, "I need to get up and get a coke."

"Don't get up," said the Marine, "I'm in the aisle seat, "I'll get it for you."

As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up the Marines shoe and spat in it.

When the Marine returned with the coke, the other Arab said, "That looks good, I'd really like one, too."

Again, the Marine obligingly went to fetch it.

While he was gone the other Arab picked up the Marines other shoe and spat in it.

When the Marine returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight.

As the plane was landing, the Marine slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.

"Why does it have to be this way?" the Marine asked. "How long must this go on? This fighting between our nations? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes and [censored] in cokes?"


Offline cosmokramer

  • Pro JTFer
  • *****
  • Posts: 623
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2007, 10:47:16 PM »
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

newman

  • Guest
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2007, 11:01:03 PM »
 :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

I heard about an P_lestinian arab woman living in Australia who went to a Doctor complaining about not having any energy and being depressed.

The Doc examined her as best he could ( which wasn't much because her husband wouldn't let the Doc touch her!).

The Doc said:
 " I can't find anything at all here, but I'm going to play a hunch. What I want you to do is go home, get a big green garbage bag and take a dump in it. Then get all your family to do the same. Then put some dead rats in there. Then leave the bag in the sun to ferment for a day.
Then I want you to stick your head in the bag  and breath deeply for half an hour  3 times a day for a week".

The woman left but came back to the Doc's office 8 days later full of beans. She said..."Doctor, your cure worked very well. I've never felt better. What was wrong with me?"

The Doc answered.."Nothing......you were just homesick."

Offline Yisrael

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 1071
  • Oy!
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #3 on: July 18, 2007, 11:06:23 PM »
Great Jokes!

We should have a Jokes section.

"Secular Zionism is racism. Religious Zionism is Judaism."
No one who votes for Obama cares that he is a crack addict or a fag. That's the scariest thing about him. --- Bonecrkr

"When I take action, I’m not going to fire a $2 million missile at a $10 empty tent and hit a camel in the butt. It’s going to be decisive."
- George W. Bush, 43rd President of the United States of America
 

Offline Dr. Dan

  • Forum Administrator
  • Gold Star JTF Member
  • *
  • Posts: 12593
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #4 on: July 19, 2007, 12:26:04 AM »
The Aisle Seat

Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat...

Just before takeoff, a Marine sat down in the aisle seat. After takeoff, the Marine kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said, "I need to get up and get a coke."

"Don't get up," said the Marine, "I'm in the aisle seat, "I'll get it for you."

As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up the Marines shoe and spat in it.

When the Marine returned with the coke, the other Arab said, "That looks good, I'd really like one, too."

Again, the Marine obligingly went to fetch it.

While he was gone the other Arab picked up the Marines other shoe and spat in it.

When the Marine returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight.

As the plane was landing, the Marine slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.

"Why does it have to be this way?" the Marine asked. "How long must this go on? This fighting between our nations? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes and [censored] in cokes?"





Oh Muck, you are the best!
If someone says something bad about you, say something nice about them. That way, both of you would be lying.

In your heart you know WE are right and in your guts you know THEY are nuts!

"Science without religion is lame; Religion without science is blind."  - Albert Einstein

Offline DownwithIslam

  • Ultimate JTFer
  • *******
  • Posts: 4247
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #5 on: July 19, 2007, 02:26:28 AM »
Newman and Muck De fuslims, both those jokes were really funny.
I am urinating on a Koran.

newman

  • Guest
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #6 on: July 19, 2007, 03:09:53 AM »
Thankyou.

Q: What's the difference between a P_lestinian arab woman and a Catfish?


A: One's ugly with big lips, whiskers and stinks to high heaven and the other is a fish.

Offline Ehud

  • Master JTFer
  • ******
  • Posts: 2476
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #7 on: July 19, 2007, 03:18:26 AM »
I'm LOLing at all of these.  Thanks guys.
"The Jews will eventually have to face up to what you're dealing with here.  The arabs will never love you for what good you've brought them.  They don't know how to really love.  But hate!  Oh, G-d, can they hate!  And they have a deep, deep, deep resentment because you have jolted them from their delusions of grandeur and shown them for what they are-a decadent, savage people controlled by a religion that has stripped them of all human ambition . . . except for the few cruel enough and arrogant enough to command them as one commands a mob of sheep.  You are dealing with a mad society and you'd better learn how to control it."

-Excerpt from The Haj by Leon Uris

newman

  • Guest
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #8 on: July 19, 2007, 03:39:38 AM »
Q: What do you call an arab girl who keeps running away from her family?


A: A virgin

Offline Sarah

  • Ultimate JTFer
  • *******
  • Posts: 3341
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #9 on: July 19, 2007, 03:49:29 AM »
That was soo funny! :laugh:

newman

  • Guest
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #10 on: July 19, 2007, 03:57:04 AM »
That was soo funny! :laugh:

I thought you were going to chew on me for that. Here's another:

Q: What's black and eats chips?


A: Half of England.

Offline Sarah

  • Ultimate JTFer
  • *******
  • Posts: 3341
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #11 on: July 19, 2007, 04:02:09 AM »
That was soo funny! :laugh:

I thought you were going to chew on me for that. Here's another:

Q: What's black and eats chips?


A: Half of England.

 :laugh: :laugh: Where do you get this stuff from!?!

newman

  • Guest
Re: The Aisle Seat
« Reply #12 on: July 19, 2007, 04:08:29 AM »
Just collected over the years.


Q: How do you spot the Polish aeroplane?



A: It's got hair under the wings