Author Topic: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye  (Read 5999 times)

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Offline muman613

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Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« on: November 27, 2014, 02:49:26 PM »
Shalom,

I write this thread with much sadness and depression. During this time we are supposed to be thankful for the goodness in the world I am faced with the most disturbing aspect of life in this world. As I announced last night in the Torah thread I posted, my favorite cat has been deathly sick. This morning she was still breathing and warm but she expired at 10:50 this morning. After staying up with Pepper from 12AM-5AM this morning before letting my friend keep her warm so I could catch a few hours of sleep when I woke up I was told she was not breathing normally. I took hold of my beloved cat who was struggling for breath and whos big wide eyes looked at me not knowing what was happening, and she shook and then passed on to the next world leaving a cold lifeless body. I cried again (as I had been crying almost all night last night) for the loss of a cat who was loyal to her keeper she would wait for me when I got home, snuggle with me when I felt alone, she was my most beloved cat (and I have had 10 cats over the last 25 years). Every beloved pet is difficult to let go when they pass on but it seems to me that when it occurs on Holidays it is especially painful.

I am struggling once again with the question of 'Why the righteous suffer and the wicked seem to thrive'. I spoke with my rabbi shortly after Pepper breathed her last breath because I needed the support of my family. I called my mother and step-dad in NY (who are on their way to a Thanksgiving event at a relatives) who supported me and told me that my cat lived a full life, one of relative comfort and who had a loving keeper. But I still have a part of my heart which is broken and no amount of words can repair.

I will miss all the unique behaviors of Pepper and remember her for the good cat she was. I just pray that her soul is gathered together with all the cat souls and her personality will be granted to another cat or maybe she deserves a soul of a human. I cannot fathom that her soul will not be rewarded for the good that she has done for my life.

Of course I have much more to be depressed about besides the loss of my cat on Thanksgiving. My medical condition is not improving and I need to have another surgery on my legs. I went to a vascular surgeon on Monday and Tuesday to have tests done and I was told that there is a problem with veins in my legs which need to be operated on. I have already had one venus closure surgery (4 years ago) and I hope that this one will finally solve the problem. I do not look forward to the surgery though as there are some complications which can arise from the procedure.

I ask that my friends who read this mention me in their prayers to grant me refuah shlema. I am so tired of suffering like this. I told my rabbi (crying) that I don't know why it seems I am cursed when I have done so many mitzvot and am helping my community build their new Shul. If only there was a reward for mitzvot in this world how much easier it would be to keep faith strong. As it is I have questions as to why we must suffer as we do even as we observe Torah and teach it.

My Hebrew name for Refuah Shelma is:

Michael Ben Shoshana (Michael Ben David)

We use the 'Son of the Mother' form of the name during prayers for healing...



You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline Israel Chai

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2014, 02:53:55 PM »
G-d willing you will have a complete recovery and stay healthy forever. My condolences for your cat, I know how great the bond one can have with a pet is, and I can barely imagine how you're feeling right now.
The fear of the L-rd is the beginning of knowledge

Offline muman613

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #2 on: November 27, 2014, 02:55:18 PM »
G-d willing you will have a complete recovery and stay healthy forever. My condolences for your cat, I know how great the bond one can have with a pet is, and I can barely imagine how you're feeling right now.

LKZ,

My good friend. Thank you so much for your concern. I know you are a good friend and appreciate it. I hope that I can see the reason for all this.

You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline muman613

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #3 on: November 27, 2014, 03:08:49 PM »
You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline Israel Chai

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #4 on: November 27, 2014, 03:20:50 PM »
Lisa's notes: Photo deleted for security purposes

Oh it would rub its face against you? My cat thinks she's too hot stuff to do that, I can't even pick her up.
« Last Edit: November 27, 2014, 03:52:29 PM by Lisa »
The fear of the L-rd is the beginning of knowledge

Offline Lisa

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #5 on: November 27, 2014, 03:27:49 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear about your beloved cat, Muman.  It's clear from looking at the video and pictures that she loved you, and that you gave her a good life.  Losing a pet is very hard.  My niece lost her dog, and she was depressed for months.

And refuah shleima to you as well. 


Offline muman613

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #6 on: November 27, 2014, 03:28:11 PM »
Oh it would rub its face against you? My cat thinks she's too hot stuff to do that, I can't even pick her up.

Pepper was so snuggly it was unbelievable.
You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline muman613

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #7 on: November 27, 2014, 03:33:22 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear about your beloved cat, Muman.  It's clear from looking at the video and pictures that she loved you, and that you gave her a good life.  Losing a pet is very hard.  My niece lost her dog, and she was depressed for months.

And refuah shleima to you as well.


Lisa,

Thank you very much. Having pets is a pleasure most of the time. The benefit for the soul is immense. I have been feeding all my pets every morning before I ate as it is discussed in Jewish thought that we should take care of those who cannot take care of themselves first, like Noah fed the animals. My cats have helped me deal with the stress of my career by being there for me and allowing me a way to express chesed (kindness). But with the good things so too come the bad things. Cats have a very limited life-span (12-18 years) and it can be counted on that our pet will die one day. This does not make it easier when it happens though.

And thank you for remembering me for refuah shleima...
You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline muman613

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #8 on: November 27, 2014, 03:38:30 PM »
Let everyone who takes care of animals and specifically animals kept as pets learn from this...

http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/1008420/jewish/Feeding-Animals.htm

Feeding Animals
Parshat Noach

During the great flood, Noah and his family were kept busy feeding all the animals in the ark. The Talmud1 recounts that Eliezer, Abraham’s servant, asked of Shem, Noah’s son, how they were able to take care of all of the animals and give them individual attention, given that the habits and needs of different species of animals are so divergent.

[Shem] replied: “We had much trouble in the ark. The animals that are usually fed by day we fed by day, and those normally fed by night we fed by night. But my father did not know what was the food of the chameleon.2 One day he was sitting and cutting up a pomegranate, when a worm dropped out of it, which [the chameleon] consumed. From then onward he mashed up bran, and when it became wormy, it devoured it . . .”

Midrash Tanchuma3 tells that one day Noah was late in feeding the lion. As a result, the lion struck Noah, and he became permanently crippled.4

Maharimat5 explains that Noah was commanded to feed the animals in the proper times. As the verse says:6 “And you, take for yourself of every food that is eaten and gather it in to you, and it shall be for you and for them to eat.” Because on this occasion he did not fulfill this command, he was punished.

In fact, the Torah commands every person to ensure his animals are fed—and in the proper time. Actually, we are commanded to feed our animals before we eat ourselves. The Talmud7 derives this from the verse,8 “And I will give grass in your field for your livestock”—and only thereafter “and you will eat and be sated.”

What follows is a digest of laws that pertain to feeding animals.

Feeding Animals before Eating

Righteous men have always sought to observe the precept of feeding animals before themselves. It is told that Rabbi Aharon Rokeach, the Belzer Rebbe of righteous memory, would purchase (or at least become a part owner of) a horse, just so he could observe this mitzvah. Before eating, he would often check to see that the animal was taken care of.9

Some say that feeding one’s animals before eating is a Torah obligation.10 Others say that it is a rabbinic mitzvah (that is merely “supported” by the verse from Deuteronomy quoted above).11 Still others maintain that it’s a pious practice, not an outright obligation.12

The Reasons:

Several reasons have been suggested:

1) It is cruel to eat while the animals that depend on us for sustenance are hungry.13

2) We must emulate G‑d’s ways. Concerning G‑d it is written,14 “And His mercy is upon all His creatures”; so we, too, show our mercy to animals.15

3) The Midrash16 suggests that an entire society might be receiving rain, sustenance, etc., in the merit of the animals. The humans may have sinned to the extent that they do not deserve such blessings, yet G‑d continues to bestow them in the merit of their animals, which committed no sin. Since our food might actually be in the merit of our animals, it’s only fair that they should be fed first.17

Which Animals?

This rule applies to all animals, birds and fish in one’s possession that are dependent on their owner for food.18
This rule does not apply to animals that belong to another,19 or if they are ownerless. Nevertheless, if one encounters a hungry animal, it is proper to feed it, unless that will cause the animal to continually return for more.20

More Details:

* One need not necessarily feed his animals before his every meal; some animals only require one feeding a day. The rule simply means that if the animals’ mealtime has arrived, one may not eat before they are fed.21

* Similarly, if the animals are hungry, the owners must feed them even if they are not yet eating. This falls under the general prohibition against causing pain to animals. Thus, one must feed his animals even on a fast day.22 In fact, it was the custom of some righteous men to personally feed their animals on Yom Kippur, to elicit divine mercy.23

* If one recited a blessing on his food and then realized that he has not yet fed the animals, he may interrupt—before taking a bite—and instruct someone to feed the animals24—this although it is generally forbidden to speak between the blessing and actually eating.25

* There is disagreement between halachic authorities whether the rule applies to snacking too. Taz26 holds that it is forbidden only to have a full meal before feeding the animals, whereas snacking is permissible.27 Magen Avraham28, however, holds that one may not even have a taste of food before feeding the animals.29

* Sefer Chassidim30 says that it is permissible to drink before one’s animals. He proves this from the story of Rebecca and Eliezer—where the Torah says that Rebecca gave Eliezer to drink first, and only afterwards did she fill the trough for the camels. Similarly, when Moses drew water from the rock, it says:31 “An abundance of water gushed forth, and the congregation and their livestock drank”—implying that the people drank before the animals.32

To conclude with a fascinating story: The holy Arizal once mentioned to one of his students that he had a “mark” on his face as a result of the sin of causing pain to animals. Upon investigating, this Torah scholar found out that instead of feeding their chickens in the morning, his wife would let them forage for their own food. When he corrected this, the Arizal remarked that the mark on his forehead was gone.33

Feeding Animals Non-Kosher Food

One may feed animals non-kosher food, unless the food contains a mixture of meat34 and milk that were cooked together.35 Therefore, one should ascertain that pet foods do not contain such a mixture.

Chametz on Passover

As it is forbidden to benefit from chametz (leavened bread or grain) on Passover, one needs to find suitable non-chametz foods for one’s animals. Check your local (or online) Kosher for Passover food list to find out which pet foods are acceptable.

Feeding Animals on Shabbat & Holidays

On Shabbat and major Jewish holidays, it is forbidden to feed stray animals.36 Stray dogs are an exception to this rule, due to their limited food sources.37 Some extend this allowance to include any animal that is actually starving.38

For this reason, it is better not to feed birds on Shabbat Shirah39 (the Shabbat when we read the Song of the Sea as part of the Torah reading), despite the common custom to do so.40 Similarly, one should not feed the fish when reciting Tashlich on Rosh Hashanah, despite the popular custom to do so,41 though some justify this custom.42

Feeding Animals Human Food

It is forbidden to feed animals food that is fit for human consumption, as this is seen as a degradation of the food, and akin to showing contempt for the bounty that G‑d has given us.43 Eliyah Rabah44 questions whether this is the actual halachah, or just one opinion expressed in the Talmud. Some permit the feeding of human food to one’s own animal, but not to someone else’s.45

If the food is leftover and will otherwise be discarded, it is certainly permitted to feed it to animals.46
You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline muman613

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #9 on: November 27, 2014, 04:29:22 PM »
The end of life is a given in the world which we live in. Hashem, according to our tradition, did not intend there to be death in the world. Because of mankinds special trait of free will was death brought into the world. Now it is a given that anyone born will ultimately expire. Limitation is a part of the physical world so we are limited in our understanding, limited in our ability to achieve, limited in our ability to live. We must live with the ultimate cold stark reality of death.

But we do not accept the end as being the end. Although the body remains, cold and unmoving, I believe the spirit is moving and being unburdened. I am still very angry at losing my cat who loved me so much and I ask myself if there was more I could have done it makes my heart very heavy. Life is beautiful and I thank Hashem for bequeathing life to me and those I love in this world. But death looks ugly and it makes my head spin how a spirit existed one moment, is gone the next.

I have dealt with death before. I remember the days in my 20s when I used to go around so proud that I had never experienced the death of a close relative (first hand) or pet. I did not know death and it seemed hard to fathom. In my 20s I felt like I was invincible. But the longer you live the more darkness can enter your life. Now I know death.

My brother in 2001, my father in 2010, and my step father was given years to live and that was over 10 years ago (his cancer is spreading now). My grandparents died when I was younger and their passing did not affect me like my immediate family...

I really want to believe that Hashem wants the best for us. I am angry at the moment because this catastrophe (my cats death) was unknowable only a week ago (it came out from the blue). And having to happen on our Thanksgiving day (when my friend was supposed to make a Turkey meal) is a hurt which will not soon fade.

Please understand that I am sharing these feelings in order to heal and not to depress anyone. I feel bad calling my rabbi with such bad news because I do not want to bring down his spirit on a day which should be a day of being thankful.

You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline Israel Chai

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #10 on: November 27, 2014, 07:08:19 PM »
As it is I have questions as to why we must suffer as we do even as we observe Torah and teach it.

That's just life. You're tortured the whole time and if you don't act very thankful, then you're tortured forever. Considering you spend your life getting used to torture, as far I can see that's all that exists.
The fear of the L-rd is the beginning of knowledge

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #11 on: November 27, 2014, 09:00:07 PM »
Just learned that at about the time my cat died there was a small aftershock of the 6.0 Napa quake last summer.

http://www.sacbee.com/news/local/article4177989.html

Quote
Families celebrating their holiday in Napa County may have felt a little shaking this Thanksgiving, the result of a pair of small earthquakes around the city of Yountville.

The first, a 2.5 magnitude quake, hit at 10:27 a.m., less than three miles south of the city. The second quake was slightly larger, registering a magnitude of 3.1 at 12:36 p.m., about four miles south/southwest of Yountville. No injuries or damages were reported, said Sergeant Doug Wilkinson of the Napa County Sheriff’s Department, Yountville station.


I take note of this because on the day my father passed, lehavdil, there was a quake I felt at the time I heard the news.

My father, may his soul have peace, died on January 8th, 2010. I work in Silicon Valley (San Jose) and here is the news report...

http://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/41-Earthquake-Strikes-Bay-Area-80920692.html

Quote
Thursday, Jan 7, 2010 • Updated at 5:06 PM PST

A 4.1-magnitude earthquake near Milpitas, Calif. shook the Bay Area at 10:09 a.m., the United States Geological Survey said in a preliminary report.

The quake, centered 6 miles east-northeast of Milpitas along the Calaveres Fault, was relatively shallow, occurring 6 miles underground. NBC Bay Area audience members and Twitter users reported shaking as far away as San Rafael and Walnut Creek, as well as in San Francisco, San Jose, Menlo Park and Dublin.

Twitter user xtinasf told NBC Bay Area, "Felt very much so over here -- house shook for like 40 seconds ... in Walnut Creek."
At the other end of the Bay Area, Twitter user jonjayh reported, "It rattled the windows really well in South San Jose."

Quote
http://urinieto.com/2010/01/earthquakes-in-the-sf-bay-area/

Yesterday was the first time in my life I felt an Earthquake. Today it’s been the second time. Two small Earthquakes in Milpitas, CA in two consecutive days (4.1 and 3.8 magnitudes respectively). Yesterday I was in class when it happened, today I was in my bedroom. In both cases I could feel the building shake as if it were made out of paper.

People here are used to Earthquakes. But now they’ve started talking about The Big One Coming. There is one Big Earthquake in the San Francisco Bay Area every 100 years. The last one destroyed the city as you can see in this picture:
http://judyonthenet.com/2010/01/08
You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline muman613

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #12 on: November 27, 2014, 09:39:48 PM »
I still cannot let go of Pepper and I miss her so much now. I have barely eaten a thing today and have no appetite. I will attempt to get a kitten at the adoption station on Sunday but even so it will not replace the one and only Pepper which I love.

You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #13 on: November 28, 2014, 12:02:10 AM »
My last post (I hope) on this topic. This goes out to the JTF 'cat' people... A sample of my cats through the years.





















You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline Dr. Dan

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #14 on: November 28, 2014, 12:34:08 AM »
Muman

Everything will be ok if not in this world, in the next one. Do not dispair. I will pray for a speedy recovery.

Regarding your kitty cat, it's also ok. You should never suffer the loss of your own human children, Gd forbid.   

The love of your own kids is so so so different than a pet. I hope you will see that day soon. Amen

If someone says something bad about you, say something nice about them. That way, both of you would be lying.

In your heart you know WE are right and in your guts you know THEY are nuts!

"Science without religion is lame; Religion without science is blind."  - Albert Einstein

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #15 on: November 28, 2014, 02:38:27 AM »
Muman

Everything will be ok if not in this world, in the next one. Do not dispair. I will pray for a speedy recovery.

Regarding your kitty cat, it's also ok. You should never suffer the loss of your own human children, Gd forbid.   

The love of your own kids is so so so different than a pet. I hope you will see that day soon. Amen

Shalom Dan,

Thank you for the kind words. I understand the loss of a parent for their children, having to witness my parents despair at the loss of my brother at the age of 33 gives me that understanding.

You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14

Offline Israel Chai

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #16 on: November 28, 2014, 02:40:22 AM »
lol look at everyone coming together. This and this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZ46Ot4_lLo and thinking about what I said tells me one thing: the only thing that's real, and the only thing that's beautiful is misery.
The fear of the L-rd is the beginning of knowledge

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Re: Death of a Loved One : Final Goodbye
« Reply #17 on: November 30, 2014, 08:40:54 PM »
lol look at everyone coming together. This and this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZ46Ot4_lLo and thinking about what I said tells me one thing: the only thing that's real, and the only thing that's beautiful is misery.

Life is beautiful, the hope and the opportunity of life is thrilling. Knowing that our grant on it should not make the entire experience sad. Rather we should enjoy each and every moment we can. This is my experience and this is my advice. Do not lose hope and use mourning to make yourself more prepared for the rest of our lives.

It is easy to be depressed in this world and it requires true faith that there is a reward in the next world. Those who have strong faith have an ability to live through the toughest of days and still hold on to their belief that things will end for the good. We should work to make our activities in this world bring forth healing (Tikkun) and know that we will be taken from this world when the time is right.

I loved Pepper and now I am not sad anymore. I do miss this cat and it is unpleasant to think about how close we were but I have come to see the good which Pepper brought to my life (and those around me). I cannot be selfish and be angry that my close pet died when she lived a very good cat life and provided me with a lot of support. I honor her by being strong and moving forward.

And moving forward I did today. After mourning three days I did go to the pet store and I did adopt a cat. Not only did I adopt a cat, I adopted two cats (sisters). And it has been 3 hours they have been in my home and they are settling in very well. I have not given them names yet and hope to think of names before tomorrow evening.

The first is tan (lighter than Pepper):



The second one is completely black:

You shall make yourself the Festival of Sukkoth for seven days, when you gather in [the produce] from your threshing floor and your vat.And you shall rejoice in your Festival-you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow, who are within your cities
Duet 16:13-14