Newmans Jokes

[Kiwi]

I being keeping off the Aussies jokes 

  you are temping me newman 

[Kiwi]

 

What's an Aussie males idea of foreplay?



Breathing.

[newman]

What's an Aussie males idea of foreplay?



Breathing.

I thought it was...."You awake, Luv?"

[Kiwi]

What's an Aussie males idea of foreplay?



Breathing.

I thought it was...."You awake, Luv?"

Or "can you roll over?"

[newman]

What's an Aussie males idea of foreplay?



Breathing.

I thought it was...."You awake, Luv?"

Or "can you roll over?"

What's negro foreplay?



"Don't scream or I'll cut you, b*tch!"

[Kiwi]

How to satisfy an Aussie man, One pair of tongs, one BBQ, snags and a six pack of beer 

[newman]

Aussie bloke in a bar:

Bloke: "Hello Darling. Buy you a drink?"

Woman: "You're wasting your time. I'm a lesbian."

Bloke: "So what part of Lesbia are you from?"

[Kiwi]

I have to split this off into a joke thread I reckon 

[Kiwi]

[newman]

That movie looks like something the Goodies would have come up with. 

[Kiwi]

I have not seen it yet but its won a few awards, I have seen the trailers, this naked sheep biting this guys neck.

Almost sounds kinky 

[Boeregeneraal]

they're angry at the Springboks for taking the cup 

[Kiwi]

Well we thought it would be nice if they won something, because if not they would never play with us again

[Boeregeneraal]

Well we thought it would be nice if they won something, because if not they would never play with us again

yes........enjoy them ,for now.....we shall talk again when we have REAL rugby players 

[Kiwi]

Well we thought it would be nice if they won something, because if not they would never play with us again

yes........enjoy them ,for now.....we shall talk again when we have REAL rugby players 

The Springboks have alot of history they need to live up too. It makes life interesting thats for sure. 

[Boeregeneraal]

ja! And also, these days it's all about the money. The good ol days, remember those, where it was about the game....it will return!

[Kiwi]

ja! And also, these days it's all about the money. The good ol days, remember those, where it was about the game....it will return!

I hope so its something our countries need, its apart of us.

[Boeregeneraal]

ja! And also, these days it's all about the money. The good ol days, remember those, where it was about the game....it will return!

I hope so its something our countries need, its apart of us.

indeed REAL men, not action figures 

[Kiwi]

Yes and Not boys  Only good sport has a blood rule 

Real men being super manly, grrrrrrrrr 

[Boeregeneraal]

Yes and Not boys  Only good sport has a blood rule 

Real men being super manly, grrrrrrrrr 

A rare occurence in australia though  (jk!!!!!!)

[Kiwi]

Yes and Not boys  Only good sport has a blood rule 

Real men being super manly, grrrrrrrrr 

A rare occurence in australia though  (jk!!!!!!)

Very rare 

[Boeregeneraal]

Yes and Not boys  Only good sport has a blood rule 

Real men being super manly, grrrrrrrrr 

A rare occurence in australia though  (jk!!!!!!)

Very rare 

(jk!!!!)

[Kiwi]

I am not, thats why my future Mr Infidel is NOT Australian 

But he will be converted. 

[Boeregeneraal]

 
So he will be coming to live in aus?

[Kiwi]

Hahahaa I say yes 

I have Property here. And he has two years left before he retires, and I want to raise my babies in Australia not the US.

I never asked him once to be an Aussie its his choice. 

We have to deal with the US problem