you must feel Judaism in the heart, and not just boast that you are so smart about Torah and Talmud.
I want to comment on this line separately, because I feel it deserves special treatment.
What is most important for a Jew is to understand the Jewish Idea, which forms the
foundation for everything else.
First of all, I have nothing to boast about. I am not smart at all about Torah, and most
certainly the Talmud. I am but a mere novice, taking his first baby steps, barely dipping
my toe hesitatingly into the vast sea of Torah and Talmud knowledge. I have a long
way to go.
However, everything is relative, and relative to you, I am a bit more
advanced, so I thought I would offer you some insights (and with sincere humility, I
hope you will consider some of those insights).
The Neturei Karta, ymach shemam, are supposedly very "smart about Torah and Talmud."
After all, they spend hours every studying Torah, Mishna, Gemara, Talmud, Tosefta,
Mishnaiot, Rishonim, Achronim, Musar, Emuna. But do you consider them good Jews?
The "rabbis" of the treasonous Yesha council who urged the Gush Katif protestors to
exercise restraint instead of showing violent opposition to the expulsion, surely were
knowledgable in the Torah and Talmud, yet would you say that their advice was
correct?
The hundreds of thousands of "Ultra-Orthodox" in Israel who refuse to acknowledge that
the foundation of the State of Israel, who refuse to serve in the IDF, who do not show
any gratitude for the money that the State (which they refuse to acknowledge) gives
them for Torah study---do you think
they are good Jews?
Examples of rabbis, Gedolim in Torah, who committed terrible mistakes and betrayed weak
faith in God, are unfortunately numerous throughout Jewish history, and many such cases
are cited in the Mishna. you will learn more about it when you listen to the Torah shiur I
mentioned in a previous post.
Various Sifrei Musar (Jewish ethics books), recommended for people who are in the
process of Chazara BeTshuva (such as myself), detail a hierarchy of levels of a person's
faith. The highest level is that of a Jew who performs a mitzva not because he thinks
it makes sense or is just, but because he is commanded to perform the Mitzva. So,
for example, you are supposed to avoid murdering a fellow Jew not because you think
it makes sense, but because God
forbade you to do so. Because today you
think it makes sense, and tomorrow it will seem justified to kill a Jew who, for example,
killed (God forbid) raped your daughter. Does he deserve to be killed? Sure, I think
so. But it is not up to you. It is up to the Sanhedrim (may it be re-established in our
time) to decide.
Anyway, you and I have a long way to go.