Author Topic: Advice Please My brother just proposed to a [Non-Jew]  (Read 3019 times)

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Offline Aces High

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Re: Advice Please My brother just proposed to a [Non-Jew]
« Reply #25 on: March 02, 2010, 10:24:44 PM »
60 percent of marriages today end in divorce.  Tell him to hold off on making babies for a long while.  There ain't no going back once a baby is in the picture.  Explain to him the financial aspects of divorce with a child.  That may help him change his mind about getting married so early in life.

Offline The One and Only Mo

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Re: Advice Please My brother just proposed to a [Non-Jew]
« Reply #26 on: March 03, 2010, 02:57:56 AM »
Ask Chaim. I'm not sure what you are required to do halachically, but your parents should have the first crack at talking to him.

Offline nessuno

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Re: Advice Please My brother just proposed to a [Non-Jew]
« Reply #27 on: March 03, 2010, 09:02:45 AM »
If he has a Chabad rabbi, he knows the depth and severity of his decision to marry outside of the faith.  This suggests to me that he truly loves her.  He has contemplated this marriage under less than ideal circumstances.  I think when family members do things we disagree with, we can roll with it, for better or worse, and love them through it OR we can become hysterical and selfishly contemplate how this affects us.

I say go with number one.  It doesn't mean you approve.   
Excellent post. 
If you push your brother, it may make him more determined.  By push, I mean make him see what you believe is right.
I agree that loving your brother, and being there for him, is the best you can do.

I also agree that, today, 22 years old is very young for marriage.
I will pray for you and your brother.  May everything work out for the best.
Be very CAREFUL of people whose WORDS don't match their ACTIONS.

Offline New Yorker

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Re: Advice Please My brother just proposed to a [Non-Jew]
« Reply #28 on: March 03, 2010, 07:01:14 PM »
Sigh, they're not going to get married, they're in their early 20's? Both under 22? Still kids, and as inconsistent with their convictions as all kids are, they'll be in another place in just a few months. Right now, they're drunk with passion and are swept away with the romantic "idea" of it, the reality on the other hand, will scare the bejeebus out of them and they will bail, I can almost guarantee it! How do I know? Decades of experience, some of it personal.
« Last Edit: March 04, 2010, 02:56:40 AM by דוד בן זאב אריה »
Nuke the arabs till they glow, then shoot them in the dark.